Rules for The Coop that the books don't tell you. My experience as a newbie.

[jackieo61028]

I'm new to this chicken biz so I'm just learning as I go. I'm mentally taking notes on what I need to paint on my Chicken Coop Rules sign.
1. Never wear flip flops when you have pretty pink toenails like mine.
2. Never go inside empty handed. They expect treats. They EXPECT treats.
3. Do the shuffle walking in because they WANT OUT.
4. If a chicken or two gets out, they WANT BACK IN. IMMEDIATELY. But go ahead and chase them around the coop 26 times. It's good for your heart.
5. Don't get too close to their faces. Sometimes they think eyelashes are worms. There isn't much going on up their in that little bird brain.
6. The chickens want to be fancy. They will steal your jewelry at all costs. So what if they have to take a finger off to get it? They may even fly at your chest like a ninja to get that diamond necklace. You won't see it coming. You WILL feel the aftermath. I'm adding a basket at the door to deposit all valuables. You'll get them back when you exit.

And today I'll add...
7. Don't bend over, I mean, unless you want poop on your back.

I'm sure there are many more I'll add as the days go on. Do you have any?

 

[GitaBooks]

I think I needed that list when I got chickens. LOL!

1: Oh yeah, they go for the toes, the fingers, the eyes, and yes, they go for the lips as well!
2: How do you spell EXPECT? Oh yea, D. E. M. A. N. D.
3: If you have 40 chickens in one coop and try to walk through a door, you should practice walking through a flash flood first
4: You have 300 ft of fence with one opening. The chickens manage to slip out of that 1 ft opening, and yet they try to get back through every other foot besides that one
5: Thankfully, I have glasses. Still, I think they are considering how to get around them when they stare at my eyes the way they do
6: Have you ever heard trying 99 times and only once succeeding? Well, the chickens are sure those buttons will come off your shirt if they just keep trying
7: When I bend over at feeding time, the hens will all try to jump onto my back, as if that will get them food faster


Thanks for sharing!

 

[jackieo61028]

I think I needed that list when I got chickens. LOL!

1: Oh yeah, they go for the toes, the fingers, the eyes, and yes, they go for the lips as well!
2: How do you spell EXPECT? Oh yea, D. E. M. A. N. D.
3: If you have 40 chickens in one coop and try to walk through a door, you should practice walking through a flash flood first
4: You have 300 ft of fence with one opening. The chickens manage to slip out of that 1 ft opening, and yet they try to get back through every other foot besides that one
5: Thankfully, I have glasses. Still, I think they are considering how to get around them when they stare at my eyes the way they do
6: Have you ever heard trying 99 times and only once succeeding? Well, the chickens are sure those buttons will come off your shirt if they just keep trying
7: When I bend over at feeding time, the hens will all try to jump onto my back, as if that will get them food faster


Thanks for sharing!

I really didn't know what to expect going into this. Now I know to expect everything. I've been pecked in the eyeball at least three times. Lol. Also, freckles are treats.

 

[Zerlog]

Here are some I learned from keeping chickens.
1. Chickens think scabs are treats
2. They will visciously destroy any small animal they see (frogs, mice, beetles, etc.)
3. They destroy any kind of garden they get into.
4. They will try to steal food from small children.
5. Chickens are SMART. they seem to know how to annoy you when you least expect it. (example: pooping on the main sidewalk or driveway, eating your favorite plants

)

These are the only ones I can think of now, but if I remember more, I will post them.

 

[GitaBooks]

Here are some I learned from keeping chickens.
1. Chickens think scabs are treats
2. They will visciously destroy any small animal they see (frogs, mice, beetles, etc.)
3. They destroy any kind of garden they get into.
4. They will try to steal food from small children.
5. Chickens are SMART. they seem to know how to annoy you when you least expect it. (example: pooping on the main sidewalk or driveway, eating your favorite plants

)

These are the only ones I can think of now, but if I remember more, I will post them.

Agreed!

If you get poison ivy and then handle chickens, the scabs will be gone very quickly. And chickens love food! They miss the food and grab your fingers regularly. And yes, chickens are smart, always when you don't want them to be.

 

[N F C]

These are all great, they should be required reading, especially for anyone new to chickens, lol. A couple more based on my experience:

* There's nothing better than pooping right inside the door or the gate, forget all that other room in the coop or run
* Whatever one chicken is eating, it's always better than what another one is eating (even if they are the exact same thing)
* If you're the first chicken to find something, grab it, run with it and squawk loudly for attention so all the other girls will chase you in a game of keep away
* If it's shiny, it must be yummy
* All food is chicken food
* If someone has raked up a pile, it's meant to be kicked and scratched apart

 

[GitaBooks]

These are all great, they should be required reading, especially for anyone new to chickens, lol. A couple more based on my experience:

* There's nothing better than pooping right inside the door or the gate, forget all that other room in the coop or run
* Whatever one chicken is eating, it's always better than what another one is eating (even if they are the exact same thing)
* If you're the first chicken to find something, grab it, run with it and squawk loudly for attention so all the other girls will chase you in a game of keep away
* If it's shiny, it must be yummy
* All food is chicken food
* If someone has raked up a pile, it's meant to be kicked and scratched apart

They are all so true, but the one that I think is the funniest is certainly three. I always try to tell my chicks "if you don't scream the others won't steal it" but they do it anyways. Its like they are asking to have it stolen from them.

 

[N F C]

They are all so true, but the one that I think is the funniest is certainly three. I always try to tell my chicks "if you don't scream the others won't steal it" but they do it anyways. Its like they are asking to have it stolen from them.

I know! I think they all just enjoy a good old game of chase the food carrier!

 

[Blooie]

Great thread! If I may add -

In every flock there will always be "that one".

*The one who hides when all the chickens are put away for the night, comes out an hour later, and begins to frantically pace the entire run trying to get in. That will also be the one who runs like
the devil is on her tail when you finally see her and try to catch her to put her back.
*The one who pulls sneak attacks from behind and nails the calf of your leg, then looks all innocent when you turn around.
*The one who insists on sleeping in the nest box, no matter how many times you go out after dark and put her up on the roost.
*The one who becomes "Attilla the Hen" and goes seriously broody, until you invest in a clutch of eggs for her - then she has no idea what you're talking about.
*The complainer - the one who screams at all the others for everything from standing in her spot at the feeder to breathing her air.
*The one who finds the space in the perimeter fence that a mouse couldn't get through, then ends up getting mad because the others are getting treats and she can't remember where she sneaked out.
*The one who loudly belts out her rendition of the "egg song" when one of the others lays at 6:00 am, but can't seem to remember how to lay an egg herself until she hears you mention "freezer camp". Then she'll churn out eggs faster than the chocolate assembly line in that famous I Love Lucy episode.
*The one you rescue and work weeks to save, but can't seem to show the slightest amount of gratitude when she's back to her old self!

And generally speaking, that one chicken will end up being your favorite!


Dear, sweet Gladys - "The One" at Oleo Acres.

 

[N F C]

@Blooie , I love it...you really nailed it

And Gladys is lovely!