Oh, so... before I completely forget it. You guys give me nightmares.
The other night, after all that pig talk, I had a terrifying dream that I went outside to do something with the chickens, probably bring them treats, I shouldn't be surprised if I even spoil them in my sleep, and, lo! I see a huge freagin rhino stomp through the trees! It appears for a second, and is gone behind the trees again.
I'm a bit shocked to see a rhino rampaging through my yard, as I think most residents of Michigan would be, and it looked angry, and I am confused, so I walk, not run, back into the house hoping it doesn't notice me. But all my chickens and cats are out there, and I need to save them from the rabid angry rhino, so I go back outside. No sooner do I get back out than I see a cat go tearing past, and the rhino is in close pursuit. I feel sick and terrified, but what the hell am I supposed to do? It's a rhino!
All of a sudden, it becomes clear to me, it is not a rhino, it is a giant, escaped, invasive, mean, hungry, angry, ravaging boar.
The chickens seem to be in hiding, but the big pig is chasing all the cats every which way, and it keeps knocking them out of the trees, and it was horrible because all I could do was watch.
So... yes, I blame you all.
I also had a dream a couple nights later that had something to do with an animal which had the head of a pug, the body of a spider monkey, and the nails of a sloth, and in my dream I looked at in in horror and I knew it was all you guys' fault, but I am no longer clear on exactly why that is.