The Political Chicken
Why did the chicken cross the road?
DONALD TRUMP: We will build a big wall to keep illegal chickens from crossing the road. We will have a door for legal chickens.
JOHN KERRY: We will trust the chicken to tell us whether it crossed the road or not.
CHRIS CHRISTIE: We need to water-board that chicken to find out why it crossed the road.
RAND PAUL: It’s none of our business why the chicken crossed the road.
NANCY PELOSI: We will have to wait until the chicken crosses the road to find out why it crossed the road.
CARLY FIORINA: Hilary Clinton lied about why the chicken crossed the road.
BRIAN WILLIAMS: I was there and crossed the road with the chicken.
BEN CARSON: This isn’t brain surgery. It wanted grain.
SARAH PALIN: The chicken crossed the road because, gosh-darn it, he’s a maverick!
BARACK OBAMA: Let me be perfectly clear. If the chickens like their eggs they can keep their eggs. No chicken will be required to cross the road to surrender her eggs. Period.
HILLARY CLINTON: What difference at this point does it make why the chicken crossed the road?
GEORGE W. BUSH: We don’t really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not. The chicken is either with us or against us. There is no middle ground here.
BILL CLINTON: I did not have sex with that chicken!
BERNIE SANDERS: That little chicken will pay 80% income taxes no matter what side of the road it’s on.
AL GORE: I invented the chicken.
AL SHARPTON: Why are there no black chickens in the road?