My brother is having his leg removed February 12th - Advice?

Hi all. My husband, Rob (Nifty-Chicken), keeps mentioning how helpful this forum is, even in non-chicken related matters, and has suggested I try posting here for ideas/help.

My brother was in a car accident in November of 2006 and after a number of unsuccessful surgeries will be having his left leg amputated above the knee in a little over a week - February 12th - at Cedars-Sinai in West Hollywood, CA.

Suggestions from anyone who has been through or helped someone else through losing a limb would be wonderful. I've read a bit online, but I'm sure I'm not entirely prepared to mentally/emotionally support him through this experience.

In addition, I can also really use help/suggestions with two other things.

1) Places to stay near the hospital - inexpensive but clean/safe. Does such a place exist?

2)Fundraising/posting ideas? I'm planning to solicit financial aid from friends and family to help with my brother's expenses. I have a donor prepared to match funds up to a point which I'm sure will help, but I'm wondering if the average donor likes some kind of recognition....like the kinds of scrolling banners you see on a Relay for Life donation page, or a Breast Cancer walk page, where the person can put a message with their name and opt whether or not they'd like their amount to post. I'm thinking no amounts(?), But it may be nice to have some kind of capability for posting donations and it would be nice if it were automated. Has anyone seen any kind of website offering this for free? Does anyone have any other fundraising ideas they've used in raising funds for family or friends in a similar situation needing money to pay for medical bills/living costs?

Thank you, in advance, for your help!

-Emily (NiftyChick)

Talk to the hospital first. They have charity funds for these things. And it sounds a little messed up but for a charity drive you could sell socks with the "be glad you have 2 feet" concept.

Yeah, I don't know how that would go over with my brother, but that is a very clever idea. I will give it some thought. And thank you for the suggestion of talking to the hospital. I hadn't thought of that.

Are you sure that he HAS to lose the leg ? 4 YRS ago my mother was in an ATV accident . She was on the 4-wheeler with her now ex-husband going around a curve in the road when some teenagers came around in the wrong lane and hit them . She broke her leg in 20 places , and is missing half of her tendons . The first night the doc told me they were going to amputate , but after 4 hours one of them said they'd try something new . After spending 4 months in a hospital bed at our house with this contraption around her knee (it wieghed 30 lbs and found out later that she had an infection all that time becuase she's allergic to metal ) She was in a wheelchair for 2 months .then a walker for another 3 months and now she has 80 percent mobility . It was a hard time on us all . My sister just had a baby , I'd come home get the kid fed and changed , then dress moms wounds , empty her poop bucket , give her a bath , and take care of the kid the rest of the night .

I guess what I'm getting at is .....are you sure he HAS to lose the limb ? If he does , just try to help him out to a point where he does'nt feel worthless . I know my mom felt that way . Give him little projects to do , make him feel as good about himself as you can . Healing will only begin when they feel like it won't totally ruin their lives . Just be there for him !!!!! So sorry to here about it though ........life sure has funny ways to teach us !

Emily, My prayers will have you and your brother and husband in them. I know that hospitals usually have a hotel or rooms for family members at lower rates at near by motels, Inns etc. If you have kids with you or not ;ask if there is a Ronald McDonald house near by, you'ld be surprised. there's one in Ormond Beach Florida:Who knew! I know no one personally that this has happened too, only professionally.have I been with them and their families. It takes courage, patience, anger ,depression , anger and then work and hope and life changes any way so there will be new jobs or careers or not. But it gets better because you would let it. That I have seen. Micaela :aww

The hospital may have a "hotel" type set up for family members to stay. We stayed at a set up like this at University of Iowa, when my son had his heart surgeries. It was nice to be able to stay in the hospital. You can call the hospital and ask what type of arrangements they have for family. I know that some hospitals work out deals with local hotels for reduced rates for family members as well.


For a fund raiser you could host a Taco or Spaghetti dinner. I have seen those be pretty successful. If you know anyone that owns a bar/restaurant that could host it for you that helps, otherwise a VFW hall or something similar would be pretty inexpensive to rent.

When my husband had cancer in 2006, a restaurant in our town did a fund raiser for us. Tickets were sold for 7.00 for a BBQ plate. The person buying the ticket only had to give them the ticket and get their plates. Mike the owner of the restaurant keep 3.00 and gave us 4.00. They raise enough to really help us stay afloat and for that I'm truly grateful, I pray your brother will be OK.

First of all, the pic w/your baby is beautiful
Anyhow, I am not of much use on this topic, other than thinking that if he still of a young-ish age, wheelchair basketball and things like that would be great to try & get him involved in. Maybe try & find someone locally who has been through a similar situation but is already on the 'other side' (through the depression/anger, etc) to be-friend him.
Kristi

I'm no help on the subject but I'd like to offer my prayers and good vibes for your brother and your family.

Your Brother, You and your family are in my prayers. Please let know how he is doing.

Lisa