Admit it - you could use more adventure in your mundane life. You could use some excitement, some spontaneity. And what says "spontaneity" like the purchase of three six-foot emus? Imagine the look on the face of your wife/husband/landlord/neighbor/preacher when you bring these guys home. And if they question your judgement, just tell them that you considered chickens, but knew you could not be satisfied with anything less than a bird that could look you straight in the eye, because you are just that secure with yourself. And if the rest of the world is going to judge you, then so be it
That's right. You need emus
Emus aren't ordinary birds. They're like people. They're like people with feathers. And they're talented, too. They are amazing thieves and love shiny things, so if you have wealthy friends fond of wearing nice jewelry, you MUST buy these birds and invite your blinged-out friends over to pet them! While petting the emus, your wealthy friends will be relieved of their wrist watches, bracelets...you name it. Within a month they will have paid for themselves with their pickpocket skills alone! And when they're not robbing your unsuspecting friends blind, they lay eggs that look just like the dragon eggs in "Game of Thrones," so it'll give you something to discuss with anyone who has HBO.
We prefer to sell this trio of emus - one male and two females - together. The oldest female is six, the younger female is two and the male is also two.
Serious inquires only. Please see attached photo for an idea of what you're getting into. And yes, that is her "happy face."
I thought this was so funny
