Please help...My son is leaving for Europe for 2 years...

Hi,
Just wondering how you are doing. Everyday colleges are sending e-mails and packages of information for my son... Why is everything so far away?

Each day I am reminded that I will be in your shoes soon enough, so I think about you.
I hope it is getting better.
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I replied to your post, but I did it wrong and didn't "quote" you so it just showed up as a normal post. Post #7 was a reply to your post...in case you didn't see it.
 
Have you ever used Skype? My dad moved to Ireland when I was 15 and between visits, Skype was a great way to not feel so far apart.

Yes, thank God for Skype! We haven't used it yet, but that is going to help a lot. Phone calls and even texts aren't cheap, so messaging on Facebook and using Skype will be so great. We're lucky we have this technology.
 
Quote: Yes, I got it. I sometimes think I quote and don't quote, so I assume others do the same.
I was thinking of you yesterday while I was making potato salad.

I told my husband that when the kid heads off to college I plan on there being a lot less food around the house, so he needed to mentally prepare now.

This will be our last year together with our son.
He also is an only child.

I have friends who are so ready for their kid to move out. I am not. He is kind, helpful, polite, smart. I like him. He is an enjoyable person. Why would I be in a hurry to get rid of that? However, I always kept in the center of my brain that he is a gift that I will have to give away eventually.

I think you need to be around as many people as possible. Dive into something. Take a class at the community college, or join a club of some sort. Take a quilting class or something that gets you out of the house and doing something busy.
You will want to have something interesting to tell your son when you skype.
I am glad you are feeling better. I know you really miss him. How is you husband holding up?
 
Yes, thank God for Skype! We haven't used it yet, but that is going to help a lot. Phone calls and even texts aren't cheap, so messaging on Facebook and using Skype will be so great. We're lucky we have this technology.

Oh you're going to love it! I used it all the time with my dad...it was the next best thing to actually being in person.
 
Yes, I got it. I sometimes think I quote and don't quote, so I assume others do the same.
I was thinking of you yesterday while I was making potato salad.

I told my husband that when the kid heads off to college I plan on there being a lot less food around the house, so he needed to mentally prepare now.

This will be our last year together with our son.
He also is an only child.

I have friends who are so ready for their kid to move out. I am not. He is kind, helpful, polite, smart. I like him. He is an enjoyable person. Why would I be in a hurry to get rid of that? However, I always kept in the center of my brain that he is a gift that I will have to give away eventually.

I think you need to be around as many people as possible. Dive into something. Take a class at the community college, or join a club of some sort. Take a quilting class or something that gets you out of the house and doing something busy.
You will want to have something interesting to tell your son when you skype.
I am glad you are feeling better. I know you really miss him. How is you husband holding up?

I felt the same way about him leaving. People are always waiting for the day when the kids move out and I was always dreading it. It was nice having him around too. Sure, there were things he did that were annoying, like leaving plates in the sink...but I would rather have him here and have extra dishes to wash. He and I did bump heads occasionally because...well...he's young and I'm not, but for this past summer, we were both being extra nice and patient with each other...no bickering and that kind of silly stuff. That makes this just a little harder.

My husband is fine....I guess. I think he shed a tear on the ride home, but other than that, he hasn't said much. We don't talk about that kind of stuff much. He knows this hit me hard, but he has no idea how hard. I mostly keep this stuff to myself ...and the kind people on Backyard Chickens
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Yesterday was better, but I think it was because I was on the phone with my sister for over 5 hours. Today, not so much. I'm a little angry that the world is so small and that people just have to travel so far instead of staying around family like they did in the old days. Everyone in my and my husbands family has left for other states and we're the only ones that have stayed. I guess I'm going through the grieving process. For me, it's denial (when he first applied for this scholarship), then sadness & depression (when he got accepted and left), then anger (life sucks) and then acceptance (hopefully comes soon).

I do stay busy though as I have a home business that I have to take care of, it's just hard to now be here alone and not see him all day. He took off work for the last month (since he was leaving), so I was with him everyday. I think, all and all, my circumstances (far away Europe-2 long years-being home with him everyday-only child-good guy-abandonment issues) is what's making this extra hard on me...but then I heard on the news about this poor woman who lost her son to a drowning and I put this all back into perspective and make myself realize that this is not so bad after all. I have to focus on the fact that I can skype him, message him and that I'll see him again, and hopefully he will be able to come home to visit next year.
 
My son has this thing about spoons. Open the dish washer and put in your spoon. Really. Not that difficult. But they accumulate in the sink.

Last year as I would wash the sink full of spoons I would think, 'I am going to miss this plethora of spoons when he goes." and It just quit bugging me.

Yep, spoons. He mixes electrolyte water, and chocolate milk, and a bite of this or a snitch of that, and because he is not a double dipper, if he wants two bites of the pasta sauce cooking on the stove he uses two spoons.
I have explained to him that it is a habit his one day wife will pummel him for. It could actually make or break a relationship.

I think because my parents believed that I was a possession, and It felt like an iron fist to me, I am more willing for my son to travel, move away...as long as I am welcome to come visit, I do not want him to feel cemented to his parents out of obligation.
My grand parents let their kids go, but my parents were...as my mom put it, she wasn't going to let me get out from under her thumb. She was much happier with the relationship than I was.

We have a university close to home, but because I was not allowed to even think of going anywhere but there, I do not want our son going there. It is a fantastic school, highly rated, excellent programs, but I am biased against it because as my mother put it, 'You go there or no where.'

I think your son is going to have the best experience ever. And when he tells you of all the marvelous things he is experiencing, you will be glad you reared such an independent boy.
 
I noticed this thread and got curious, because I find it interesting to see how people from abroad view our country.

So, how are you holding up, and how has your son liked his stay so far? If I understood correctly, Finland was first on the list. Where is he studying?

Regards,
Felix from Finland
 

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