All of those are just lovely! I wrote this for my daughter when she was expecting her first baby.
It was a long time to be in labor, but I knew the end result would be worth it. So I gritted my teeth, did what the doctor told me to do and suddenly there you were. I hurt. Touching you for the very first time comforted me.
It was the middle of the night. You were cutting your first tooth and had a miserable cold on top of it. You were hungry but your mouth hurt whenever I tried to feed you. To make matters worse, it was hard for you to breathe and eat at the same time. But soon your sleepy little eyes drooped down and, with a bit of milk dribbling down your chin, you started to doze. I wiped the milk from your face and stroked your cheek. You hurt. My touch comforted you.
It was your first day of school. You were so excited in the days leading up to your first big adventure away from home, but your little bottom lip started trembling halfway through your first-day-of-school special breakfast. By the time we reached the school you were in tears, telling me that you didn't need to go school. I crouched down beside you and took your hand in mine. “Let’s do this together,” I said softly, hoping you wouldn't hear the trembling in my own voice. You hurt. Holding my hand comforted you. I hurt. Feeling you relax as you squeezed my fingers comforted me.
It was your wedding day. You were so beautiful and happy that you made my throat ache. I was not going to let you see me cry, not even joyful tears. After the lovely ceremony gave you to him, I suddenly realized that tomorrow you wouldn't come downstairs to share a cup of morning coffee with me. I hurt for the wrong, selfish reasons. The next morning the phone rang. I dried my tears and answered it. “Hey, Mom!” you said with excitement, “Phone hug!” It was our code, and even long distance your touch comforted me.
I started remembering all of those tender touches – the times we comforted each other through the years. The skinned knees, the bloody noses, and the hurt feelings could all be soothed with a touch. The moments of doubt I had in my ability to be able to say the right thing, to do the right thing when you needed me were erased each time your trusting hand reached for me.
Today is Mother’s Day. Traditionally children take this opportunity to tell their mothers how special they are. The flowers are lovely. The card is perfect. But it seems topsy turvy for me to be getting any special treatment today. Today is really your day. This day doesn't belong to me for being your mom. It celebrates you for being my child, for you are the reason I am able to hold this most honored title – the title of Mother.
And in a few more months, my dearest daughter, you will begin to understand. When you labor to bring your first child into the world, you will hurt. And touching your new baby for the very first time will comfort you. Thank you for touching my life.
The child I was referring to was our Austin. We lost him 22 short years later. And again Tammy and I found comfort in each other's touch. Happy Mother's Day to all of you my friends, whether you are the mother to one child or many, have no children but hold a child in your heart, and to those of you who, like me, have known the pain of losing a child. I've always thought today should have been called, "Happy Woman's Day" because whether we are moms or not we are still united in that one great truth - we are women who accomplish.