10 years ago today...

[Momagain1]

My brother Brad was killed at the age of 24.

Brief background:

Brad was born with a congenital heart defect; by the age of 13 he had a pacemaker. Never did graduate HS due to his health.

He was a single parent, with sole custody of 2 boys, Shane age 6 then and Trevor, age 4 then. His little girl was born 9 days after he was killed.

He was riding his bicycle on the side of the road as per the rules of the road in IL.
a cars driver decided to pull out to pass another car (happened to be an off duty police officer)...and when he pulled out, he pulled out too far and
hit my brother dead on.

My brother did NOT have a helmet. That may have saved his life. so you say a short fall from a toddler on a bike cant hurt them? a short fall for a teenager
cant hurt them? Bicycle riders dont NEED to have a helmet...well guess what? thats what my brother said too..wonder what he would say if he was here now?

When in the hospital on life support..we were waiting an excruciating wait for the brain wave testings to come back...and for my other brother who is in the military to
be red crossed home...

once home...the testings confirmed he was Brain dead...

When brad was born, due to his heart defect, he had to have an immense amount of donor blood to save his life during surgery.
We knew as soon as they said he was brain dead...that he would want someone to live on with his help.
We as a family, made the decision to donate his organs/tissues.

He saved lives...he enhanced lives...he gave a chance to a li'l baby boy in Chicago to live..that baby was either going home w/a new liver or to a morgue...unfortunately his body
rejected Brads liver and he died...but others lived...and are living!!!

While we miss Brad terribly..and his children will never again see him in this life...I am so darn proud of him and what he gave back in his life and after his life had ended.

His children miss him something awful...they dont have a very good mom..but I am thankful God is looking out for them and they have not done anything really bad in their life as of now..
his little girl Rylee..unfortunately never got to meet him...but we try to teach her about him thru pictures and stories!

I ask that you honor him by doing one or all of the following things:

A: ANYONE who rides a bicycle; WEAR A HELMET; no matter what age or how far you are going...(do you really think my brother thought he was gonna get hit???..and after this situation happened w/my brother, my sons uncle..my son, well he went head over handle bars and landed square on his helmet; cracked it..can you even think of what it would had done to his head???)

B: Anyone who has the opportunity to donate blood, platelets, organs/tissues in the unfortunate even of a brain death and/or certain heart deaths...please do so.. if you have ANY questions about organ/tissue donations, please pm me..as I was central IL volunteer team leader for our local organ/tissue organization for IL)...

C: PLEASE..I know most of us drive..but please pay attention!!! The guy who hit my brother...has since had a nervous breakdown shortly after he hit him..we dont know him or anything about him..except that we heard thru the grapevine he had a breakdown back then. I dont wish him ill will...I just hope he remembers my brother...
PLEASE pay attention when you drive..it only takes a second! This guy was NOT drunk, drugs etc..just an error in driving...

Thank you for reading about my brother Brad...I miss him terribly!!

 

[ibpboo]

 

[redhen]

I cant even imagine...

I almost lost my brother(he was shot), It shook me to the core.
I cant imagine... So very sorry.

 

[Momagain1]

yes..I cant imagine that either!!

a whole bunch of freaky things happened the night he was hit..I had a headache I could NOT get rid of...
my son said "Uncle brawwy" was in the corner of his room by the ceiling and said "things would be ok"..
HE DID NOT KNOW he had died!!! he just knew we were at the hospital to see uncle brad because he was hurt really bad...
(he told me this and then gramma told me what he said too) gave me chills...

shortly after his death; of course 9/11 happened..and all that death just made us feel worse..it was terrible...for everyone!

 

[Robins378]

Wow, you BYC peeps have some pretty inspiring stories here. So sorry to hear bout your brother!

But that's so darn awesome bout the donated organs, it's great how you can save a life like that!

How're his kids goin? That had to be pretty hard on yall, cool of you to remember him like this

 

[turney31]

 

[sourland]

About the 'freaky' things that happened. When my Mom died (32 years after my father), my wife had the same mental vision of my father saying, "Dorothy what took you so long?" I was driving when this mental image came to me-- set the hairs up on the back of my head. When I got home my wife immediately said to me, "Your Dad is greeting your Mom" and recounted the same image and verbage that had come to me. There is more about the soul/spirit than we are compleely aware of. Your brother lives on in those that his organs have helped.

 

[Spookwriter]

Ten years, and only yesterday.

You never forget.

I lost my younger brother in 1985. The date never
comes around that I don't remember.

So yes...I hope we all remember the various family members
we've each one lost.

Thanky you for taking the time to tell us about your brother, and the
way that he helped others even in his death.


Spookwriter

 

[mikensara]

I do beleive that our departed loves ones are always near. I have heard that children are often able to sense they are being watched over.

 

[Spookwriter]

I'm not trying to take away from this post or hi jack it, but to
take a moment and reflect on it.



We all need to take the time to say "I love you" to those we love
while we're on this side of the grave. Don't lose that chance today,
because tomorrow may very well be too late.

There is no promise of tomorrow for any of us.

But there is a today.

Don't waste it.

So many times as we fight and argue with family members, isn't it
really over some of the silliest most trival of things? Things that don't
really seem to matter in the end.

I've buried a younger brother and an older sister.

All these years, and I know that I still stand by by their grave and have
a million things I wish I could say. Some words perhaps, that we even
wish we could take back.

I don't guess life works that way.

We honor those who have passed away from our life by remembering them.
Sometimes in thoughts, sometimes even by placing a flower on a grave. And
we do that because they are forever a part of us, always in our heart and
forever just a thought away.

But there is today.

So take the time to really say "I love you" to those that matter in your world.

Don't let it be three empty words.



Spookwriter...who loves his family with all that he is