Actual Church Bulletins

Discussion in 'Games, Jokes, and Fun!' started by Hobbley_Farm, Nov 24, 2008.

  1. Hobbley_Farm

    Hobbley_Farm Chillin' With My Peeps

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    Sep 9, 2008
    Pilot Mountain, NC
    1."Don't let worry kill you -- let the church help."

    2.Seen On a Church Bulletin: Thursday at 5:00 PM there will be a meeting of the Little Mothers Club. All ladies wishing to be "Little Mothers" will meet with the Pastor in his private study.

    3."This being Easter Sunday, we will ask Mrs. Lewis to come forward and lay an egg on the altar."

    4.Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles, and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children.

    5.Weight Watchers' will meet at 7 PM. Please use the double door at the side entrance.

    6.The eighth graders will be presenting Shakespeare's "Hamlet" in the church basement on Friday at 7 p.m. The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.

    7.The Rev. Adams spoke briefly, much to the delight of his audience.

    8.Tuesday at 4:00 PM there will be an ice cream social. All ladies giving milk will please come early.

    9."Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our church and community."

    10.The service will close with "Little Drops of Water." One of the ladies will start quietly and the rest of the congregation will join in

    11.The Low Self-Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 to 8:30 PM. Please use the back door.

    12.During a Minister's Illness: "God is good - Dr. Hargreaves is better."

    13."For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs."

    14.Pastor is on vacation. Massages can be given to the church secretary.

    15.The rosebud on the altar this morning is to announce the birth of David Alan Belzer, the sin of Rev. and Mrs. Julius Belzer.

    16.The preacher will preach his farewell message, after which the choir will sing, "Break Forth With Joy."

    17.Next Sunday a special collection will be taken to defray the cost of the new carpet. All those wishing to do something on the new carpet will come forward and do so.

    18."This afternoon there will be a meeting in the South and North ends of the church. Children will be baptized at both ends."


    19.The choir invites any member of the congregation who enjoys sinning to join the choir.


    20."Thursday night - Potluck supper. Prayer and medication to follow."

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  2. Taylorbird

    Taylorbird Chillin' With My Peeps

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    Nov 19, 2008
    Good Ole GA
    [​IMG] That's pretty funny [​IMG]
     
    Last edited: Nov 24, 2008
  3. Guitartists

    Guitartists Resistance is futile

    Mar 21, 2008
    Michigan
    [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG]
     
  4. Fudgie

    Fudgie Hatching Queen - Got Fudge?

    Oh warn me better before I read these. I was giggling so loud and tears are flowing freely! [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] I'm trying to be incognito while on BYC at work! [​IMG]
     

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