Am I being unreasonable?

Discussion in 'Family Life - Stories, Pictures & Updates' started by Frosty, Jul 17, 2010.

  1. Frosty

    Frosty Chillin' With My Peeps

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    Mar 30, 2008
    ND
    We sell veggies at a local market. I finally got DH to quit with the store bought fertilizer and have been working my butt off amending the soil with compost. I have been telling folks that buy my veggies that I am trying to keep everything as organic as I can. Then came this year. I don't think there is an inch of the garden that DH didn't spray with Round-up. He even sprayed some 'weeds'and took out one of my best producing strawberry patches (the other good patch he decided to burn the weeds and killed it, too so all that is left are the escapees). Last year he mentioned spraying a bunch of weeds in the berry patch and I told him to keep the spray away from it. This year he sprayed a large section, I didn't find out until after the fact.

    Yes, there are a lot of weeds. Partly because he plants too much of everything and I am the only one pulling weeds in a garden that is well over 50,000 square feet. I keep trying to tell him to go for quality instead of quantity and to just mow the empty spots but he doesn't listen. Then when I am in the middle of trying to weed, he comes out and tells me that we should have dinner soon so I am supposed to quit to fix dinner.

    I just went out to the garden a bit ago and noticed that most of the weeds on my compost pile are dying. While it is dry here, I suspect that he sprayed Round-up on my compost pile. I am absolutely furious and now don't want to use that compost. Am I over-reacting or would you be furious, too? I don't want chemicals in the garden and have now lost all interest in it. I am ready to tell him that the only thing that I will have to do with the garden is the actual selling. Now what am I supposed to say when folks ask if I grow organically?
     
  2. CoopCrazy

    CoopCrazy Brooder Boss

    Mar 3, 2009
    Columbus,IN
    I would be LIVID [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] I would flat out refuse to help in the garden until he stops this ..
     
  3. PineappleMama

    PineappleMama Chillin' With My Peeps

    Sounds like you hubby has a hearing problem... I recommend cast iron. [​IMG]

    Seriously, this isn't a miscommunication he is flat out refusing to give a crap about your feelings, needs, etc.

    He probably wouldn't care for it if you started dowsing his vehicle in Dr Pepper because "you think it's good for it" (when in reality it'll eat the paint like a teenage boy on a pizza)... and you wouldn't do that, too smart, but you most definitely wouldn't KEEP doing it after he pointed out that it was DESTROYING something he cared about.

    This isn't about weeds, it's much more serious than that. You need to figure out what the problem is, and only way that's going to happen is if you talk about it... well there is the cast iron or Dr Pepper methods but they really just prolong the problem.

    If it was mine I'd have to say "If I can't depend on you to listen to me about this small tiny thing, how in the world am I supposed to depend on you for the big things? If I told you I had a cramp in my stomach would you just ignore me until my appendix burst, or would you LISTEN and actually give a crap." But, that's me. I can get kinda riled up.

    [​IMG]
     
  4. imtc

    imtc Chillin' With My Peeps

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    Oct 30, 2008
    I don't think you are being unreasonable at all and I too would be mad. Luckily my DH has no interest in my garden so I don't have to worry about that kind of thing. I am also leary of eating things that have been sprayed with chemicals so totally understand, sympathize and agree with where you are coming from. [​IMG]
     
  5. oldchickenlady

    oldchickenlady Chillin' With My Peeps

    May 9, 2010
    Cabot, AR
    I would just quit with the garden totally...see how he likes that! There is no way you can sell your veggies as organic, and since there is no such thing as Slightly Organic or Kind of Organic, you are just SOL. If anyone asks you MUST be honest! Some people have severe reactions to chemicals and that is why they buy organic in the first place, some just want the safest food for themselves and their children, so obviously, your husband has ruined your property for YEARS! No, I don't think you are over reacting at all, and yes, I would be furious! In fact, I would be so furious that I wouldn't help with it at all. Period. I wouldn't eat anything out of it either. I'm just saying...
     
  6. oldchickenlady

    oldchickenlady Chillin' With My Peeps

    May 9, 2010
    Cabot, AR
    I would just quit with the garden totally...see how he likes that! There is no way you can sell your veggies as organic, and since there is no such thing as Slightly Organic or Kind of Organic, you are just SOL. If anyone asks you MUST be honest! Some people have severe reactions to chemicals and that is why they buy organic in the first place, some just want the safest food for themselves and their children, so obviously, your husband has ruined your property for YEARS! No, I don't think you are over reacting at all, and yes, I would be furious! In fact, I would be so furious that I wouldn't help with it at all. Period. I wouldn't eat anything out of it either. I'm just saying...
     
  7. WhiteMountainsRanch

    WhiteMountainsRanch Chillin' With My Peeps

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    Jun 19, 2010
    Sandy Eggo, CA
    Technically you can't sell anything as "organic" unless you are certified... you can't become certified unless no chemicals have been sprayed in more than 3 years on the land you are planting AND if neighbors within a 1/2 mile radius has not as well... That's why most people choose not to get certified, as the regulations are VERY strict....

    IMO you CANNOT with a clear conscious sell any of your products as organic. You could sell them as "home-grown" etc, and market them in a little different way.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jul 17, 2010
  8. PotterWatch

    PotterWatch My Patronus is a Chicken

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    Apr 22, 2008
    Virginia
    I too would be furious. It does sound like he is just ignoring your wishes. Maybe he knows what you want but just isn't comprehending how much you really mean it. Perhaps you should sit him down, let him know your wishes again and explain what it could mean in lost revenue. I'm sure some of your customers might go elsewhere if they found out about what he is doing. I know I will always pick the farm stand that is pesticide free.
     
  9. greathorse

    greathorse Chillin' With My Peeps

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    Oct 1, 2008
    Northern Colorado
    I cant help you with your husband but I can answer your question about whether or not you now have anything close to an organic garden and the answer is NO. What you now have is home grown produce that will not be able to be described as organic for three years.

    Most home gardners that use Organic to describe their product keep the same standard as the the big growers so you will not have organic for three more years. Are your veggies safe and delicious and better than store bought I would say probably but they sure will not qualify as organic in any ones defintion.
     
  10. Ms.FuzzyButts

    Ms.FuzzyButts Chillin' With My Peeps

    Sep 5, 2009
    North Alabama
    Quote:Sorry, I did read and empathize with the rest of your post, but that one sentence made my blood boil. DH does that to me too! It annoys me to no end. DH is hungry, the world must now come to a stop!! I dont say anything because he's great in every other aspect or he would surely starve... [​IMG]
     

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