Can I punish DH for something he did 12 years ago?

Discussion in 'Family Life - Stories, Pictures & Updates' started by chickensducks&agoose, Apr 30, 2011.

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  1. chickensducks&agoose

    chickensducks&agoose Chillin' With My Peeps

    I went to a party today, and ended up chatting with a lady there. She apparently went to school at the same college I did, at the same time, and remembers me being in a class with her (probably true, but I don't remember it). Anyway, i got home and mentioned her to DH, and he started to blush and stammer. Apparently, during an 'off' phase when we were just starting to make a life together (we were on for 4 months, then off for six, then back on forever), he and she apparently had a 'thing'.... and I am really mad. I'm mostly mad because i feel like she had a 'secret' with DH, and knew it the whole time, didn't even give me a hint, (like "oh yeah, your DH and I dated a little bit a long time ago... i wouldn't have been surprised or super mad) and i feel frustrated that anybody has knowledge of DH that I don't have. DH insisted on FULL Disclosure when we met... and 2 years ago, i was told by a mutual friend that DH had 'known' another of our mutual friends before we dated... and i never had a clue.. am I just hormonally insane, or am i justified?
     
  2. redhen

    redhen Kiss My Grits... Premium Member

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    Well.. i for one dont blame you at all for your feelings.... it would kinda bother me too.
    But they dated when you all were broken up right? He didnt like cheat on you with her?
    You pretty much have to let it go..and just remember who he married...
    Dont let it keep bugging ya...
     
  3. Funky Feathers

    Funky Feathers former Fattie

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    No, just let it go or it will eat you up inside. Let the past stay in the past. You weren't even together so he was not cheating. Leave the past where it belongs if you want to be happy. From a happily married gal. [​IMG]
     
  4. sourland

    sourland Broody Magician Premium Member

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    This happened 12 years ago during an "off" phase in your relationship. Why punish the guy and yourself? I can't see where there is anything to be gained from that. If your present relationship is good, past history is just that--PAST. Talk it out with him, but let it go-- for the sake of both of you and your marriage.
     
  5. Tuffoldhen

    Tuffoldhen Flock Mistress

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    12 years ago? Get over it sweety!! Not worth a jealousy bone!
     
  6. Britney

    Britney Chillin' With My Peeps

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    If I ran into an ex-boy friends wife I would never say to her, "oh and by the way a used to date your husband" I wouldn't phrase it differently I would not bring it up. On the other hand if we became friends then I learned I dated her husband 12 years ago I would keep myself distant from her from the point of discovery and let her husband handle it. It is not a big deal, you have your prince.
     
  7. Mahonri

    Mahonri Urban Desert Chicken Enthusiast Premium Member

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    Quote:Amen.

    TWELVE YEARS AGO!.... FORGET ABOUT IT!

    You can tell him you are disappointed that he didn't mention her to you during the "full disclosure" period, forgive him and forget it.
     
  8. DuckLady

    DuckLady ~~~Administrator~~~BYC Store Support Staff Member

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    Oh take him out and shoot him.

    Seriously, make him eat worms and chicken scratch for one meal then forgive him.
     
  9. sgtmom52

    sgtmom52 Birds & Bees

    Quote:Amen.

    TWELVE YEARS AGO!.... FORGET ABOUT IT!

    You can tell him you are disappointed that he didn't mention her to you during the "full disclosure" period, forgive him and forget it.

    x 2!
     
  10. Mahonri

    Mahonri Urban Desert Chicken Enthusiast Premium Member

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    Quote:[​IMG]


    [​IMG]
     
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