DH's good friend and his stupid dog-a vent! Warning...it's long!

Discussion in 'Random Ramblings' started by wischickenlover, Nov 27, 2007.

  1. wischickenlover

    wischickenlover Songster

    Mar 5, 2007
    Ladysmith, WI
    About six weeks ago, a friend of DH's came for a visit and to have supper, and with him came his uninvited dog. See, he didn't have anyone to watch his "baby". We have a dog...a very well-behaved in-the-house, non-chicken-chasing dog. We wouldn't have it any other way. In the past year, we have had to re-home two dogs who could not be taught not to "play" with our chickens. It just won't be tolerated here. I don't trust ANY dog around my flock, whether it is someone's "baby" or otherwise. So I made it clear that his dog would be staying in our kennel during the visit, as I didn't want it around my chickens (who all free-range). Well, after about an hour, the friend said his dog wasn't used to being confined, and he would be letting his "poor baby" out of the kennel. I told him NO because of the chickens. Then I get a "Oh, Ollie wont hurt your chickens! He only kills cats and rabbits!" I told him AGAIN not to let the dog run loose, but he said he would keep an eye on him. So here I am, on guard, trying to watch the dog and make dinner at the same time. The owner is too busy having a couple of beers and talking.....
    I hear all this commotion outside...sure enough, there goes Ollie like a shot through my flock "playing" with MY babies! I was furious. I yelled and told him he better keep the darn dog locked up til he leaves. And he did. IN THE HOUSE. With my cats-two full-grown, and three rescue kittens. GRRRRR. The dog spent the remainder of its visit harrassing and chasing my poor cats around. DH's friend thought it was amusing and was laughing. VERY FUNNY....NOT.

    Next visit.....a couple weeks later. He brings the freakin dog AGAIN. I am sooo angry. Another visit, same situation. This time, DH makes it clear not to let the dog loose around my animals....any of them. Yep, you guessed it, wasn't watching the dog and it kept getting loose. Luckily I had no casualties, and I'm sorry for what I am about to say, BUT......I was itchin to take my Louisville Slugger to this dog's head, as well as that of its owner! The dog wouldnt listen and the owner didnt care. DH knew I was mad, so was he at his "buddy" and the dog, but didnt want to make waves. Did I mention the dog's other favorite pasttime while at our house? Snacking on the kitty box crunchies. YECHHHHH!!!! Stay tuned for more on that later.....

    Come Thanksgiving......the buddy didn't have anywhere to go....so he visited again for Thanksgiving. Now, given that each time he brings that dog, we have problems, and I get upset....you would think he could leave his "baby" home on a holiday????? Nope! Here he comes with his mentally-challenged dog again. I WAS having a nice day with my kids, etc. Til then. So the brain-dead buddy let's his dog out with my chickens yet again. I'm yellin, runnin outside as the dog is running after my chickens "playing" with them. (forget that I am cooking a 10-course Thanksgiving meal at the same time). Feathers were flying, and I am all upset. The buddy says, "Oh, I really thought Ollie learned his lesson the last time he got in trouble for chasing the chickens-I guess not"!!! So, now I HATE this dog, and am pretty angry at the owner too. So the dog is in the house. We just got done eating dinner and we are all full. I thought I would sit down for a few minutes before clearing the dishes and putting the food away......DH's buddy says, "Oh, I would probably get that food put away right away, or Ollie will get right up on that counter and have a feast of his own!" (and he chuckled-thought it was cute!) My blood pressure was skyrocketing!
    The dog was still chasing my cats around too. And the buddy is telling us how he will be getting chickens in the spring to raise......
    DH didnt want to yell too much to make his friend mad, you know.
    The grand finale of my Thanksgiving night? The friend has to suddenly leave because the poor dog is sick and throwing up all over. What's he throwing up on? Cat poo that he spent the evening chowing out of the cat boxes in the basement. But.....it wasn't until after he left (thank God) that I noticed the nicest "gift" of all. In my DD's room, she is crying. She went to make her bed and had her new white down comforter that I got her for her b-day on the floor. The wonderful dog had made it's first "sick" trip into her room, and threw up a lake of regurgitated cat crap on her comforter!!!!
    Happy Thanksgiving!!!! I told her I would try to replace it for Christmas, but that it was expensive, and I wasn't sure if I could.

    So, then I'm enraged. I yelled at my DH and told him his "buddy" was never allowed to bring his idiot dog when he visits ever again. He told me he is so tired of hearing me complain about that dog and he will have whoever he wants visit our home.

    Told me he would take the down comforter outside and "hose it down" !!! It's dry-clean only and I seriously doubt if THIS would come out. And would I even be brave enough to take it in......

    So I am really, really angry. I just look at this dog and get infuriated....I know, I know, it's not the dog's fault....well, it partly is. You ever have a dog that's just naturally dumb? (Like people are?) Well, that's this one. And it's hyper-a bundle of nerves. And the buddy is always saying how sweet and smart his "baby" is.
    Makes ME want to throw up.

    Any suggestions on how I can handle this to try and keep the peace? I'm seriously afraid I will do something drastic if he shows up with that dog again.

    And I have to keep peace with DH-we have been married 21 years.



  2. DuckLady

    DuckLady Administrator

    Jan 11, 2007
    NE Washington State
    Your husband needs to be a man and do what's right...by YOU, not his so called friend.
  3. erinm

    erinm Posting For A change

    Feb 24, 2007
    Central Massachusetts
    well said terrielacy! ErinM
  4. TxChiknRanchers

    TxChiknRanchers Songster

    Aug 18, 2007
    Southeast Texas
    Just doesn't seem anyway to get anything done there and keep peace. You seem to have an insensative DH and a stupid dh's friend! Some serious attitude adjustment needs to occurr. I totaly agree with Terrie!
  5. Blisschick

    Blisschick not rusty

    Feb 20, 2007
    Shepherd, Texas

    I would meet him at the door with a loaded gun and tell him if that dog even leaves his vehicle, you'll dispatch it for him. That is just rude of the guy to not take the hint, even when it's dropped on him like a lead weight, and very inconsiderate of your hubby not to back you up. Sorry, but the friend and his dog seem to be more trouble than their worth. Both are destroying your house and your peace of mind, and that's just not called for.
  6. Cuban Longtails

    Cuban Longtails Flock Mistress

    Sep 20, 2007
    Northeast Texas
    I agree with Terrielacy.

    Your husband needs to put his foot down with his friend. He's being obtuse about the whole situation because he doesn't know how to deal with it. His buddy ought to be the one replacing the down comforter, or at least making amends by helping to pay to get it cleaned since it was his sick dog that did the damage.

    Try again (after things have calmed down and tempers have settled) to talk to your husband. Ask him to put himself in yours shoes. Put it in terms of what if the dog was destroying something of his. Also, try not to get emotional when you talk to him (I know it may be hard, but guys tend to wall up in those situations).

    If this doesn't work and he continues to be asinine about it, then you may need to seek an outside mediator like a pastor or counselor (someone non-biased). There is no reason for him not to come up with a compromise or at least listen to one that you have developed; you've been together for 21 years and he's going to let a <i>friend and his dog</i> rip apart your marriage? Not cool.
  7. arlee453

    arlee453 Songster

    Aug 13, 2007
    near Charlotte NC

    AND send him the bill for the drycleaning on your DD's comforter...
  8. Katy

    Katy Flock Mistress

    This happened several years ago. My brother-in-law brought his half-grown dog to our house and by the time I heard the commotion outside I already had several dead and wounded chickens....I grabbed the closest thing to me which happened to be a broom and I caught up with the dog and beat the hell out of him with the handle....that dog was scared of me from that day on and my BIL never brought him over again. I love dogs, but that day I was just sorry it wasn't something more substantial that I grabbed. My advice to you is the next time the friend shows up with dog in tow, show him your rifle and tell him the dog is out of chances and this is your answer to the problem. Shame on your husband for not standing up to his friend and backing you up.
  9. wischickenlover

    wischickenlover Songster

    Mar 5, 2007
    Ladysmith, WI
    Terrie, you have a good point. But the "attitude adjustment" is easier said than done. He does back me up sometimes...tries to walk that fine line between his friend and me...trying to keep the peace. He also has a "its my house too, and I can have over whoever I want" sorta attitude. I guess I'm just looking for some advice how to keep everyone happy....a "what would you do" scenario.
  10. wischickenlover

    wischickenlover Songster

    Mar 5, 2007
    Ladysmith, WI
    You all have a lot of really good ideas-thats what I need! Keep 'em comin! And thanks!

    I do think, however, that if I asked the friend to pay for DD's comforter, DH would get really mad....though it was my first thought!

    The rifle was my fave....I'm still pretty angry. I can see this getting to a point where one of my animals gets killed-then I WILL go off!

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