Did you ever feel like you were raising yourself as a kid?

Discussion in 'Random Ramblings' started by Smartie_Pants, Feb 22, 2009.

  1. Smartie_Pants

    Smartie_Pants Chillin' With My Peeps

    Oct 5, 2008
    Madisonville, KY
    I'm __ and I feel like I am raising myself. My mom works second shift, so I see her at the most 3 hours a day, usually more like two. She divorced my dad last year and got a boyfriend, so on weekends she goes out all day and night with him. When she gets home she sits down and immeadiatly calls him and talks to him until she goes to bed. When she gets home on weekdays she does the same thing.

    99% of the time I fix my own meal.
    60-70% of the time I do my own laundry.

    80% of the time she lets the dishes pile up in the sink and I load the dishwasher and wash them.

    She never asks me how my day at school was. In fact one day she got home and I had been setting in her chair in the living room doing homework and had notebooks in the chair. She comes in and says "Get your crap and go." She hasn't been to any parent teacher conferences to hear how proud of me my teachers are since about third grade. She doesn't take any interest in what I want to be or what school I want to go to when I graduate next year. When I ask her if we can save money and go to visit a college she just says no.

    We have a handicapped dog that I have to take care of too. Its like taking care of a baby because she can't walk on her back legs and I have to express her bladder, clean up when she poops, feed her, try to get her in her wheelchair to work her legs, etc.

    I am taking honors and Advanced Placement classes at school so on top of schoolwork I have to do most of the house work and take care of the dog. I can't do it all! I've tried to tell her how I feel and she never listens to me. Its been like this fince I was about 14, and after she divorced my dad its like she just wanted to get rid of her own life and I was something she had to keep.

    Did anyone ever feel like this a teenager?


    8. Do not post overly personal information like your phone number, address, age (especially if you are a minor) or any other personal info you don't want the whole world to see.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Feb 22, 2009
  2. luvmychicknkids

    luvmychicknkids Canning Squirrel

    Mar 6, 2008
    Floresville, Texas
    Yup.....not only as a teen, but my entire childhood. Mom worked nights, Dad slept....seriously, that is all I remember him doing. Hey, I learned to cook great!!! LOL

    Sorry you are having to though. [​IMG] I think all kids need someone taking a huge interest in what goes on in their life. Sounds like you are a great kid with a good head on your shoulders though. Keep up the good work.
     
  3. dave_Cash69

    dave_Cash69 Chillin' With My Peeps

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    Feb 15, 2009
    kaintucky
    i feel the same way sometimes.
     
  4. Ec_Prokta

    Ec_Prokta Continuum Shift Anomaly

    Jan 14, 2009
    I'm really sorry about that. [​IMG]
     
  5. rocktheflock

    rocktheflock Chillin' With My Peeps

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    Jan 24, 2009
    SW Ohio
    The LORD loves you more than anyone else ever could!!
     
  6. 1mommahen

    1mommahen Love My Cluckin' Coop

    Mar 20, 2008
    NJ
    If nothing else, it will make you better mom because of it! Keep doing well in school and that will be your ticket to anywhere! [​IMG]
     
  7. The Chicken Lady

    The Chicken Lady Moderator Staff Member

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    Apr 21, 2008
    West Michigan
    Please go to your school counselor and tell them about this and about your dreams to go to college. Your school counselor will be able to arrange visits for you, help you with your FAFSA and with college applications.

    I am very, very sorry to hear that your mom is not interested in sharing this part of your life with you. However, that doesn't mean that you can't reach your dreams.

    If you're interested in a good book, I suggest reading a book called From Homeless to Harvard. It's about a girl who was homeless because her parents were drug addicts. She took herself to school, studied hard, and actually ended up going to Harvard University. Her parents didn't even have a house or jobs, and she went to Harvard. My point is, you don't need your mom to get to the next level. You've got everything you need -- YOU. [​IMG]

    Hang in there. [​IMG]
     
  8. Mahonri

    Mahonri Urban Desert Chicken Enthusiast Premium Member

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    May 14, 2008
    North Phoenix
    My Coop
    Is there a reason you are not with your dad?

    Dad's love their little girls.

    Sounds like you are a wonderful person with great potential.

    Does your dad pay child or spousal support?

    Why did they divorce?

    I think you've explained very well why they are divorced... did she treat him like she treats you?
     
  9. deb1

    deb1 Chillin' With My Peeps

    Jun 26, 2008
    NC
    My mom had mental issues so yeah, I know how you feel. Often I was the sole person acting in my household as a adult. I signed all the forms from school for my brother, sister and myself because my mom would NOT sign forms that we needed. I do not know why. I wrote absence notes and dealt with creditors.

    Thankfully adolescence only last until you are 18. You can arrange to take the SAT on your own, fill out the Pell Grant yourself and write out all the applications to the colleges yourself. It is tough, but you've already proven that you are an incredibly strong individual.
     
    Last edited: Feb 22, 2009
  10. luvmychicknkids

    luvmychicknkids Canning Squirrel

    Mar 6, 2008
    Floresville, Texas
    Quote:This is a really good point. While I don't know your situation and don't know if that is an option for you, I am friends with several single fathers who are absolutely wonderful, involved parents.
     

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