So, tonight I snapped. My SIL has been staying with us and well she found out she is pregnant. Not that is the best time in her life or even with someone she has seen in person more then 3 times, but a baby is a joy no matter what their mother has done. Well, Today we confirmed via doctor that she is in deed pregnant, and happy as she is she posted it on her facebook wall. DH, Kevin, Made a smart butt comment about how we should get with the program and have a baby ("'before Samantha Gets Jealous" snip of exact wording), without taking in my feelings at all. I have been quite the whole time, not a word, just support for Shanna. Well, she was on her Laptop and Kevin on ours, I wanted to post something in reply to the post and Kevin wouldn't get off ours to let me, so I went into the living room to borrow Shanna's computer and asked if I could see it for a second, she snapped with a hateful 'no' and I casually told her to go blank herself. Now, I am a pretty reserved person, always, but I snapped. I tried to tell her I was sorry, but of course she just went out to smoke. I gave up, Kevin will have to do damage control again. The reason I snapped honestly is cause I have these emotions that are building up with no one to talk too. See, Kevin and I have been trying to get pregnant and I am bit jealous. I mean I also felt like me and Kevin would have kids first, then after trying for so long I gave up. I am younger then Shanna, but I feel like a old maid without the baby I desire so much. It feels so unfair that god (or another higher power) would give someone such a wonderful joyous gift that doesn't even want it, and leave my family bare. She hasn't even quite smoking. She doesn't have a job. She has no responsibility. And Everyone is making such a huge deal out of this. I just wanted to stand in the shadows and give her the spot light, but can't seem to hold anything in. Oh course DH doesn't understand why I am so upset.