Does a White Christmas Make You Blue?

Discussion in 'Random Ramblings' started by chickenfeathers, Nov 24, 2007.

  1. chickenfeathers

    chickenfeathers Chillin' With My Peeps

    Does a White Christmas Make You Blue?

    Tips for Coping With the Holiday Blues

    One December evening I was watching my neighbors put up a dazzling display of lights on their home. Judging by the wattage being consumed they had more Christmas spirit than anyone around. Suddenly I heard a barrage of angry shouts from the mother. The lights were malfunctioning and she was upset. I said to myself, "Something is definitely wrong with this picture". Although the Christmas holidays are supposed to be a time of peace, joy, and love, all too often we spend it angry, stressed, and blue. Why does this happen and how can we avoid it?

    The primary reason for holiday stress is unrealistic expectations. From the time we are children, we start to build up expectations of what Christmas should be. In the media we see perfect images of family, friends, food, parties, and gifts.

    What we fail to see is that these are only staged scenes. We may all aspire to be Martha Stewart, but the reality will probably be closer to Erma Bombeck. What we have to realize is that there's nothing wrong with falling short of perfect.

    Some tips to help you keep your expectations reasonable: Don't judge the value of a gift by its price tag. The best gifts come from the sincere desire to make a person happy. If you give from the heart, your gift will never be too small.

    You don't have to do everything that's asked of you. Learn to assert yourself and say no if you really don't have time to do something. Delegate responsibility to your children and spouse. Learn time management skills.

    Share with someone less fortunate, for example, by volunteering at a homeless shelter for a day. If you have kids, this is a great way to show them the true meaning of Christmas.

    Remember, your family is a real family, not a TV family. There will be arguments and rivalries among siblings. If Mom has always criticized you, she still will. These things don't have to ruin your holiday. You may not be in control of other people's actions, but you can certainly control your reaction to them. Take this year as an opportunity to learn forgiveness and acceptance. If all else fails, take a time out with a spouse or other sympathetic listener and vent your frustrations.

    Remember that things will occasionally go wrong. Your kids will get dirty and make noise. You will forget to buy batteries, thaw the turkey, or take the cookies out of the oven. Planes will be delayed, relatives will get tied up with other responsibilities, and dogs will jump on your favorite party dress with muddy paws. If you can learn to face these little setbacks with style and grace you'll find yourself having a better holiday than if everything had turned out perfect because now you're more relaxed.

    Can't be with someone you love because of a divorce, military commitments or finances? Find a creative way to make the holiday special. For example, send cookies, gifts, and a special videotaped greeting to a far away relative. Or arrange to spend another day together as "Christmas". Be creative. The feelings of sharing and caring that Christmas engenders can be had any day of the year. Don't limit yourself to what it says on a calendar. In fact, if you think about what's really important like love, sharing, and togetherness, you begin to realize December 25 is only one day out 365 that you have to spread peace and good will.

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  2. BantyChickMom

    BantyChickMom Chillin' With My Peeps

    Sep 25, 2007
    Henderson, NC
    Good Advice Chickenfeathers.

    I love the Holidays and I am the bigest kid of all from Thanksgiving to Christmas.
    My DH is about as opposite me as day and night but he endures my excitement because he loves me.
    He does put lights on the house and hangs my star up in the tree for me.
    I love to decorate and he is happy putting the tree up Dec. 23.
    But we have always agreed on the KIDS at Christmas, and not just our own 3.
    We have always tried to buy a few extra things for toys for tots, give to Salvation Army, etc.
    The spirit of giving should be present 365 days a year and not just Dec. 25.
    MIL used to work in the county with less fortunate people, and the people that really need all the help they can get.
    Some of her clients couldn't buy for their kids at birthdays, Christmas, etc., and that's where me and DH would help out if we could.
    To me, I just enjoy spending time with family and friends and the Holidays is the perfect time for being together.
    There's nothing more sad to me than a child waking up on Christmas morning and having nothing -- that just breaks my heart.
    DH and I don't buy gifts for each other. We allow the kids to get us something but we buy for the kids in the family and help any less fortunate person we know about if we can.
    I think the giving/receiving gifts part is mainly for the kids but the true meaning/spirit of Christmas is just being with family and friends and to share the love you have for them.
    And the cost of a gift should not matter -- it's the thought behind the gift that really counts.
    We have Christmas at my house every year, and even though we have all the trash and stuff to deal with, I wouldn't have it any other way.
    We don't have separate get-togethers either -- both mine and DH's families, along with any friends, all come at the same time and that's the way it should be. And everyone at my home will have a gift to open, regardless of how small it is. Sometimes it's only a container of homemade candy, but no one will be left out and feel like the oddball.
    I WILL NOT HAVE ANY BAD FEELINGS/WORDS EXPRESSED AT MY HOUSE AT CHRISTMAS!
    Christmas is a time for everyone to put their differences aside, and I will not hesitate to let everyone at my home know this.
    You are all welcome in my home but you will be sociable, friendly, and peaceful to anyone that's in my home in your presence, and if you can't abide by this, then DO NOT come!

    I'm not bragging or anything, and I don't want anyone to think our families don't have their differences because we do, but my point is anyone and everyone is welcome at my house, and everyone will feel welcome and be at ease and be in a peaceful, loving environment even if it's only a few hours.
    BTW, I am 36 and I cannot recall ever having a WHITE CHRISTMAS, but I'm still hoping for one every year.
    Snow at Christmas would be the icing on the cake for me.
     
  3. nccountrygirl

    nccountrygirl Chillin' With My Peeps

    Jul 31, 2007
    Sanford N.C.
    Very well put you two, there is nothing left to say, y'all said it all and very well indeed. Merry Christmas everyone.
     

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