Guardian of wild cats *the story*

[moriah6299]

This is my first story it was based off my RPG so please leave comments

The Plot:​

Hato looked at the moon and thought hard about the past Why Toabe why did you do this?I thought we were friends.Then Hato turned looking at Toabe right in the eyes "Why did you do this Toabe I thought you were better than this"hissed Hato

Toabe growled at Hato "I thought the same thing"said Toabe growled then jumped down laughed maniacly at Hato "We don't share the same dream Hato I want to make the clans better"said Toabe with a smiled then frowned "But you want to destroy that just because you say I don't have the power well I do so get out of here and never return.I will win and you will lose!" growled Toabe

Hato looked at Toabe sadly and growled. "Why Toabe,we don't need to fight I just want everthing to go back to normal !" Hato protested

Toabe growled back and lashed his tail. "The furture will be better! I will wil,Either jion or die!" he said, his voice rising

 

[rockthecoop]

This is my first story it was based off my RPG so please leave comments

The Plot:​

Hato slunk around, facing away his old friend, Toabe. I can't belive I lost my friend! He changed, it has been too long...Hato turned, looking Toabe in the eye. "Why did you do this?! I thought you were my friend!" He hissed.

Toabe jumped down from his perch and laughed maniacly. "We don't share the same_____. (I have no idea what you meant. I think you forgot to type this) I will win, and you will lose! Get out of here and never come back!" Toabe sneered.

Hato looked at Toabe sadly and growled. "Why? Toabe, we don't need to fight! I just want everything back to normal!" Hato protested

Toabe growled back and lashed his tail. "The future will be better! I will win, so either join or die!" He said, his voice rising.

It is a good idea but needs editing, good detail, and more imagery. All the edits I made you don't have to stick with, but it is just a sugestion.

 

[moriah6299]

Thanks