Have you ever been disappointed in someone you thought you knew?


10 Years
Feb 12, 2009
Western North Carolina
My brother-in-law walked out on DH's sister today. Been having an affair, is in love with someone else, packed his bags and left. She was in shock, no indication, no known troubles as far as she was aware. Everytime we saw them, they were very happy. He totally did not seem like this type at all. As far as I knew, he loved her and was a great hubby. That's what she thought too. Jeez!
Everybody gets disappointed in someone. Nobody is perfect and makes good decisions all the time. We are bound to disappoint sometimes...

But your situation; there were probably signs that you and she will remember when the shock wears off. I hate to hear about this kind of disappointment...
AND girls... heard of WAY too many cases of that... all that stuff about males thinking with ... etc... well that's a crock.

For her... only good note is that she has you, sibs, etc supporting her so she'll make it through and based on his behavior be way better off than if he hadn't come clean and left.
To be perfectly honest, if someone genuinely falls in love with someone else then I don't see what else they can do about it.

If expectations are that everyone will always tow the line and do what you think they should do based on your sense of propriety and convention, you will be disappointed in people a lot. If you try to understand their feelings and not place your criteria and judgement on their behavior, you'll be a lot happier with your fellow human beings.

My sister in law broke up with my brother and it was a very acerbic divorce.

I felt bad for both of them having to go through it. I was happy for my x sister in law finding a new happy life, and happy for my brother who met someone else.
Sorry you're having to go through that. I agree with PineappleMama, at least your SIL has a loving family to lean on. I could understand him recognizing that he had feelings for someone else and using it as an indicator that he either needed to get out of or work on his marriage, and then going about it like an adult. Having an affair behind his wife's back, though, isn't just a violation of one person's "sense of propriety and convention", it is just an insensitive and selfish thing to do and could potentially put his wife's health at risk.

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