1. If this is your first time on BYC, we suggest you start with one of these three options:
    Raising Chickens Chicken Coops Join BYC
    If you're already a member of our community, click here to login & click here to learn what's new!

I almost made an @ thread.

Discussion in 'Random Ramblings' started by rainplace, Dec 21, 2009.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. rainplace

    rainplace Interstellar Duck Academy

    Sometimes I just get mad at people. People can be so mean and hateful. Or at least it seems that way. Maybe a better way to think about it is that sometimes people are unthinking and careless with their words. Is ignorant meanness any less mean?
     
  2. hikerchick

    hikerchick Chillin' With My Peeps

    Apr 6, 2009
    Dover, PA
    Sometimes the truth hurts, though. should we lie to one another, or say what we honestly think?

    It's an interesting dilemma.
     
  3. Slinkytoys

    Slinkytoys Chillin' With My Peeps

    638
    0
    119
    Jun 22, 2009
    Black Forest
    That's why "little white lies" exist. If I can't say something nice, I try to keep my mouth shut. [​IMG] Doesn't always work, mind you......but I try to find something nice to say. It may be, "Gosh you have a large vocabulary".
    Slinky
     
  4. Bettacreek

    Bettacreek Overrun With Chickens

    5,517
    36
    278
    Jan 7, 2009
    Central Pennsyltucky
    Momma always said, "if you ain't got nothin' nice to say, don't say nothin' at'all." [​IMG]
     
  5. rainplace

    rainplace Interstellar Duck Academy

    I think sometimes it's better to say nothing at all. If we know something can be hurtful, then maybe taking the time to decide if it needs to be said is the better course?
     
  6. hikerchick

    hikerchick Chillin' With My Peeps

    Apr 6, 2009
    Dover, PA
    But if everyone just nice niced each other to death we would never have any true communication. You can't possibly agree with everything. I was taught that being mealy-mouthed was the worst sin of all. Better to be honest and risk people not liking you. With people who only tell you what you want to hear, you never really know where you stand.
     
  7. ranchhand

    ranchhand Rest in Peace 1956-2011

    13,295
    18
    291
    Aug 25, 2008
    SC
    Grandmother Lucy always said "If you can't say something nice, say 'How interesting'. "
     
  8. Dar

    Dar Overrun With Chickens

    5,930
    10
    251
    Jul 31, 2008
    Quote:there is a difference between:
    being nice and hurtful
    lying and hurtful


    it is possible to be nice and tell the truth but not be hurtful. When people say things just to hurt someone... that is wrong
     
  9. rainplace

    rainplace Interstellar Duck Academy

    Quote:So you're saying that no matter what the hurt, the cost, the whatever, say what is in your head if it is the truth? It does not matter if it is relevant? It does not matter if you could get your point across in a way that led to discussion instead of argument?

    If I see an ugly person, it's okay for me to go up to them and say, "You're really freaking ugly," because it's the truth?

    If I'm with a group of friends and one of them has bad breath, should I say so everyone can hear, "Your breath is terrible, why don't you go brush them?" Or instead should I pull them aside and offer them a mint?
     
  10. hikerchick

    hikerchick Chillin' With My Peeps

    Apr 6, 2009
    Dover, PA
    Quote:So you're saying that no matter what the hurt, the cost, the whatever, say what is in your head if it is the truth? It does not matter if it is relevant? It does not matter if you could get your point across in a way that led to discussion instead of argument?

    If I see an ugly person, it's okay for me to go up to them and say, "You're really freaking ugly," because it's the truth?

    If I'm with a group of friends and one of them has bad breath, should I say so everyone can hear, "Your breath is terrible, why don't you go brush them?" Or instead should I pull them aside and offer them a mint?

    Well, I don't see how anything could be gained by telling a stranger they are ugly. So, no, I am not saying no matter what the cost or relevance the truth must out. What I mean is, sometimes it is kinder to be honest than to keep letting people lie to themselves. My friends and I support each other in everything but we also tell the hard and ugly truths to each other. If we didn't, I don't see how we could say we were more than acquaintances.

    When someone starts a thread crying because his house keeps burning down, it's not unkind to suggest he stop playing with matches.
     
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.

BackYard Chickens is proudly sponsored by