I am gonna have another grandbaby in july or aug.

Discussion in 'Family Life - Stories, Pictures & Updates' started by chixie, Dec 11, 2010.

  1. chixie

    chixie Chillin' With My Peeps

    Apr 6, 2009
    kountze texas
    Please no negative comments. everything that you will probably say I have already said. I am only posting this because I need some moral support...

    My 17 1/2 year old daughter is pregnant. we really did not need this . abortion and adoption is not an option. her daddy and I are willing to help her raise this baby. but she will have to do the majority on her own... But we are here for her. the baby's daddy knows and says he will help but we will see... I have been crying since yesterday. we will love this baby i know. I tried everything and had everytalk imaginable about not having sex until marriage ... but mom didnt know better. ..I feel like a horrible parent... please pray all will work out. thank you
    Last edited: Dec 12, 2010
  2. zippitydooda

    zippitydooda Chillin' With My Peeps

    Apr 23, 2010
    Ottawa, Ohio
    I know that right now this SEEMS like bad news, but a new life is a gift. I'm sure that you are grieving the loss of all the plans that you supposed would happen for your daughter. BUT after you get over the initial shock of the news you will see that your daughter will still have a good life. You are NOT a bad parent. Your daughter will not be a bad parent either. Just continue to love her as she goes down a different path than you envisioned for her. Different is not bad... it is simply different.

    Feel free to write me any time if you want to talk more. My son went through this too. I realize it is different with a daughter, but I still walked on this path and know how you feel.

    Jean aka zippitydooda
  3. NonnasBabies

    NonnasBabies Muddy Acre Farms Premium Member

    Sep 20, 2009
    On the Farm!
    Quote:You know sometimes when you try to hard it makes them rebel in the opposite direction. I made sure I had the talks with mine and gave her condoms just in case!! Just as idea a little late but oh well!!

    First off why do you feel like a horrible mother?? Everybody makes mistakes. You'll will be fine and so will she. And this is coming from someone that had a baby when she was 17. I now have a beautiful 23 yo that I wouldn't trade the world for. Do not tell her you will help raise the baby, just make sure your there if she needs you. She needs to raise her own child and take responsibility for it.

    Everything will work out! [​IMG]
  4. zazouse

    zazouse Overrun With Chickens

    Sep 7, 2009
    Southeast texas

    I raised 4 girls so i know what ya are going threw, i worried the entire time, but i got lucky and my first grand baby was not born till my 2 child was 20 and the second 2 when the oldest was 22 and 25, the other 2 still have not had any but they are all on their own living in their own place.

    It's a tough world out there for our kids with or without children of their own.

    You are not a bad mom these things happen cause our kids think they know more than us and don't think it will happen to them. [​IMG]

    Good luck and keep us posted
  5. chixie

    chixie Chillin' With My Peeps

    Apr 6, 2009
    kountze texas
    Jean... thank you so much... I know we will be ok... I am so surprised at hoe her daddy has accepted it. I guess after almost loosing our other grandbaby that he figures being upset isnt worth it. I only figured out she was preganant because she weighs 100lbs and her belly is already pooching and she had a really flat tummy last usually. then yesterday she was complaining about her breast hurting. the only reason I didnt notice her morning sickness is its happening during the night. we took 3 pregnancy testsbetween yesterday and today and all positive. monday I will call the ob/gyn doctoe and get her in.

    we thought when she saw what her sister is going thru with her preemie at 19 that she would at least try not to get prego... the bad thing is her girl friends are excited. I was 19 and engaged when I had her sister it was hard then. and the comments I got from older people because I looked so much younger.. I dont want her to go thru that... and she really isnt that mature. hopefully she will grow up.
    Last edited: Dec 11, 2010
  6. rancher hicks

    rancher hicks Chicken Obsessed

    Feb 28, 2009
    Syracuse, NY
    Well here goes, There comes a point when even though you've done the best you could they still take the wrong path.

    Please, please, please do not let this fall to you. Your daughter "OWNS" this. Not you nor your husband. You can not be there to "support" her and her baby. This is hers NOT yours. You want to help your daughter? Let her carry this burden herself. If the father of this baby doesn't help then it's hers and hers alone.

    You and your husband have nothing to feel guilty about. I have four and they will do what they will do. Others think "oh you should've done this and you should've done that". To them I say bull pucky! These days young girls have no excuse to get pregnant out of wedlock. None , zip , zilch.

    You are not a bad parent, but your daughter made a bad choice for herself and her baby. Now unfortunately she's got to live with her decision. Let her. Be there for the legal stuff cuz it's comming, but let her take care of things.

    Wish you all the best

  7. gr8ful

    gr8ful New Egg

    Dec 11, 2010
    Central Texas

    I don't know the exact words to say to comfort you. But here is a prayer that came to my heart -

    "I pray, dear Lord, that you put your loving arms around this family. Give them strength, understanding, patience, and peace. May YOUR will be done in their lives. Amen"
  8. wildorchid053

    wildorchid053 Chillin' With My Peeps

    May 12, 2009
    syracuse area, ny
    i just love my grandbabies and i don't care when or why or how they got here.. so enjoy this gift you will be getting.. everything will work out..just wait and see. she will need lots of love and support. it is scarey having your first baby. maybe a councelor from a family planning place can help you through this. also i would watch craigs list and garage sales this summer for items that she will be needing.. my daughter was done haveing babies and after the last one turned 5 she decided she wanted more.. by then every baby item she had was gone.. we had a used baby shower since she is into recyling and got some very inventive gifts.. we hit garage sales etc.. have a good time with her.. it will bring you closer together.. linda
  9. Katy

    Katy Flock Mistress

    A baby is a blessing no matter that the timing might not be ideal. [​IMG]
  10. chixie

    chixie Chillin' With My Peeps

    Apr 6, 2009
    kountze texas
    we are lucky in some ways. we already have carseat .. my ither daughter ended up with 5. and I have one for when I keep her baby... and we have some baby stuff already. and If she has a boy he is all set in clothes. my oldest daughter is gonna pass her her baby things as her baby no longer needs them. so that will help alot. I know this baby is a gift. i just wish it was later. much later.. thanks everyone

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