Two months ago I took a leave of absence from my job to care for our 4 year old disabled daughter. My dh is on disability and had back surgery and great grandmother who cared for her is in her eighties and recovering from breast cancer. In the process of quitting my job, we also pulled our two oldest, ages 13 and 8 out of school and I started homeschooling. I am happy to be home but I feel like I am contributing nothing and I feel like I lost my identity. Also, not to brag, but I was good at my job and sometimes I feel like a failure like a mother. NObody is happy all at the same time. I am doing the best I can but always feeling it isn't good enough partly because in my job I had my boss's confirmation I was doing a good job and if I didn't I knew about it. I miss my job some days but other days am very glad I am home. I feel like God put me here but I am scared for our future because I feel like our country is in big trouble and I know social security won't be here forever. Also I know I need to be home to take youngest dd to physical and occupational therapy and preschool. Part of me thinks her disablitity is not going to get any better, her hand function will never work, she will never talk and so forth so I should find daycare and go back to work, but then that makes me feel a failure to feel that way and that I need to trust God. My dh is terrific but he doesn't understand, he is all-consumed on getting off of disability and going back to work. Am I crazy and should I just get over myself and deal with it or what? Thanks for listening!