I Need Seasoned Peoples Advice!!!

Discussion in 'Random Ramblings' started by hollymh, May 19, 2009.

  1. hollymh

    hollymh *A Scrambled Egg*

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    Feb 8, 2009
    Texas
    Basically I need advice from people who have lived more life than me, and made more decisions... I have a predicament, I am working on my Doctorate, and I’m almost half way there! BUT, I want another child and there is no way I can fit that into school and my family life so what would you do?!?!? I have a two and half year old little girl and I have 3 years left of school... I'm thinking I should just wait, I'm so confused, what would you do in my situation?!

    I suppose I just need conformation that my thinking and believing that I should be able to sufficiently provide for my family before adding to it, is well true!!! I'm just so scared, being the first to go so far in college in my family puts pressure on a girl lol But at the same time I want a bigger family and I don't want to be old when I have it [​IMG] I'm just at the point where I need any life experience advice!!!
     
    Last edited: May 19, 2009
  2. citrusdreams

    citrusdreams Chillin' With My Peeps

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    You've worked so hard to get where you're at right now. Plus it must have been expensive. If I were you, I'd wait. I'm quite sure you won't be too old. Women are having more children later now more than ever [​IMG]

    It's not going to be easy to take a hiatus from school to have a baby and it might be quite some time before you can go back.

    Just MOHO...
     
  3. I have WHAT in my yard?

    I have WHAT in my yard? Chillin' With My Peeps

    Jun 24, 2008
    Eggberg, PA
    So how old are you now??

    In 3-1/2 years you will still be 3 and 1/2 years older no matter which path you choose. But, I know from experience that both paths are hard. It is very hard to pick back up on school once you stop. And it is hard on your body to have children later in life.

    You can always quit school later, you cannot quit being a mother once you have a child. I do know women who have managed to do both at the same time, but it IS very hard. Where do you see yourself in your career 5 years, ten years from now? Do you need that doctorate to get there? Will you quit work if you have two children? I have a good friend who just finished her degree at 61. I have another who took 8 years to finish her PhD.....

    I still haven't finished mine since I wanted to stay home with the kids and having the letters was not going to increase my income as much as it would cost. But, I still want one so maybe I will still go back. Who knows? There are too many variables. How does your husband feel about it??
     
  4. flopshot

    flopshot Chillin' With My Peeps

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    your first priority is to establish a means of supporting your family before you go out and make one. stay in school. it's too hard to go back.
     
  5. TaLani

    TaLani ~ Gemini Chick ~

    Oct 2, 2008
    Bryson City, NC
    Quote:DITTO!! [​IMG]
     
  6. hollymh

    hollymh *A Scrambled Egg*

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    Feb 8, 2009
    Texas
    I have WHAT in my yard? :

    So how old are you now??

    In 3-1/2 years you will still be 3 and 1/2 years older no matter which path you choose. But, I know from experience that both paths are hard. It is very hard to pick back up on school once you stop. And it is hard on your body to have children later in life.

    You can always quit school later, you cannot quit being a mother once you have a child. I do know women who have managed to do both at the same time, but it IS very hard. Where do you see yourself in your career 5 years, ten years from now? Do you need that doctorate to get there? Will you quit work if you have two children? I have a good friend who just finished her degree at 61. I have another who took 8 years to finish her PhD.....

    I still haven't finished mine since I wanted to stay home with the kids and having the letters was not going to increase my income as much as it would cost. But, I still want one so maybe I will still go back. Who knows? There are too many variables. How does your husband feel about it??

    Let's see I have my Associate in Business, Bachelors in Biology (almost) and all I have left is my Doctorate, and yes, I have to have my Doctorate in order to do what I want to do... I'm not by any means old, I started life early lol I will have my Doctorate by 26... I have to contribute to something more than just me; I need to have a career!
     
  7. klf73

    klf73 Mad Scientist

    Jun 1, 2008
    Maine
    That's a tough one.....
    I am not halfway through school, but on a wait list for nursing(going to take over 8 yrs for me to be a CNPA). We are planning for 1 more and decided to do it now, so I won't have to be doing my clinicals and caring for a newborn. What you have to think about is - can you care for a newborn while still acheiving your degree? The other concern (would be for me anyway) is the age of your daughter(if you wait) when you have another baby, her having been an only child so long, some kids take it all in stride, some don't. Also, will you have time for a newborn once you start a career? Who would watch your baby while you work? I, personally, would have a harder time going to work with a newborn than going to school, but I don't know what your school load looks like and how hard/easy it is for you. Tough choice....
    dh is going to be a stay ay home dad once I start working [​IMG]

    eta- while on this wait list I will be taking classes
     
    Last edited: May 19, 2009
  8. jenjscott

    jenjscott Mosquito Beach Poultry

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    May 24, 2008
    Southeast Arkansas
    If you can have your doctorate by 26, by all means, get through school first, you'll still be plenty young enough to add to your family.
     
  9. Big Chicken Little

    Big Chicken Little Chillin' With My Peeps

    Quote:I agree...your education is so important especially in light of these economic trying times. I am 63 and my youngest is 13 it is great having children later in life. Be happy with what ever you choose !!
     
  10. klf73

    klf73 Mad Scientist

    Jun 1, 2008
    Maine
    is it an either/or? is it quit school to have a baby or go to school and not have a baby? is there any way to do both? will you be able to have a baby with that career or will you have to not work?
     

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