I thought the hard part was over.... Sigh..... Depressed

kelseygirl707

Dances with Chickens
10 Years
Mar 3, 2009
3,535
12
211
Lakeport, Ca.
Ugh, About 7.5 months ago I miscarried at about 7 weeks. I had depression about it for about 6 weeks after, and my husband tried to understand that I couldn't control my emotions, but he just couldn't completley understand, really nobody can unless they go through it, so I spent a week at my parents, and felt a little better being with my mom, Also my MIL was a big help, as she had gone through it many years before. Anyway, I thought once the depression over loosing the pregnancy was over, it would be over, I never anticipated that 7.5 months later it would hit me so hard that I would have had a newborn right now. I woke up at 5 am, and couldn't go back to sleep, cause it was on my mind. I'm trying to keep my mind on the fact that My eggs go to the hatcher day after tomorrow, and this weekend I should have some new chickies, But it's just such a weird thought that I would have a newborn right now. I don't know, maybe it's hitting me so hard, because Hubby and I had tried for 6 months unsuccesfully to conceive again, and just this month decided to go back on Birth Control, as we don't like where we're living, and don't want to raise children here. Whatever the case, I just needed to get my thoughts out, and I know the people here are sooo supportive. I hope I don't upset anybody. Thanks for listening. God Bless.
 

Jena

The Welsh Witch
11 Years
Nov 2, 2008
1,312
10
151
Cardiff
What you are feeling is perfectly natural.

be kind to yourself, talk to your husband and plan for a time when you will feel able to try again and work towards that.

 

texaschickmama

Songster
12 Years
Sep 19, 2007
2,608
13
201
Poolville, TX
I have lost two babies. Both in the 2nd trimester. I had to actually go into labor and have them, knowing they were to be born angels. It was the hardest thing I have ever gone through. I'm the kind of person that just wants to heal on my own. Over the years, my heart has healed a little, but I will always ache for those two precious boys that are in Heaven waiting for me. It's hard, there's no two ways about that. Just let your heart heal a little at a time and soon God will bless you when He feels it's the right time.

They found what was wrong with me. I have some blood clotting issues and had to have two shots a day in my tummy the whole pregnancy. That made the delivery a little risky because of the blood thinners.

The good news is I have a precious little 3 yr old girl named HOPE. So, keep the FAITH and everything will work out the way it is supposed to.

God bless you and your hurting heart. Try to smile and let your heart heal.
 
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ODS-n-ENS FARM

Songster
11 Years
Sep 16, 2008
608
0
131
NH
It does/will get easier.....give it time. I have been pregnant 6 times and I only have 1 son. My last 2 pregnancies(one of them was twins) where the hardest loss for me. What we did when there due dates came was bought balloons and released them .
Take care of your self but its okay to acknowledge the "birthday" just my thoughts.....
 

Hangin Wit My Peeps

AutumnBreezeChickens.com
11 Years
Apr 20, 2008
6,396
28
263
Birnamwood, Wisconsin
I miscarried twice before I know exactly what you mean.
I did the SAME thing when time came where the baby should have been here. The only difference is I was able to have babies (three) so it has to be much harder for you ...I'm so sorry! My thoughts are with you and I hope when the right time comes along you will have that baby and live happily ever after
IMO the best thing to do is talk about it. Especially to hubby. BTW I did the same thing...went to moms
I was young and needed mommy. Later my hubby told me he felt terrible I had done that and left him alone but I had not clue he felt that way. I guess he was depressed too and I didn't even see it
I forget HE would have been a daddy too.
 

Chickenmaven

Songster
10 Years
Feb 6, 2009
2,064
12
181
Michigan
Kelsey, it IS hard. You are fortunate to have a lovely mom & MIL...your DH, too.

Alot of times we try to contain feelings because we think we are supposed to be "over it" or not make a fuss. It is okay to feel sad. Own it. Float with it. You had a loss and that is a very real thing.

(If, however, you reach a point where it is hard to do the day-to-day stuff, that's not okay. You might want to see your doctor. )
 

kelseygirl707

Dances with Chickens
10 Years
Mar 3, 2009
3,535
12
211
Lakeport, Ca.
Thanks everybody, I love this site, the people are amazing! We are working on moving, but that involves Finding a job, in a city where my husband can go to school, he recently decided he didn't want to be a plumber anymore, and went back to school to become an engineer, I so proud of him. Plus the kind of job we are looking for is in short supply, so I have a feeling it's going to be a while. And even then, we both think it would probably be for the best to wait until he graduates to start trying again, so two years. The good news is, this is why I met all you wonderful people, when we decided to stop trying to conceive, we got an incubator to keep me busy, and I'm guessing that by next week, those chickies will be keeping me pretty busy. Anyway thank you all so much, I feel truly blessed to have found this site.
 

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