If you have long-term houseguests....

Discussion in 'Family Life - Stories, Pictures & Updates' started by gritsar, Aug 19, 2010.

  1. gritsar

    gritsar Cows, Chooks & Impys - OH MY!

    Nov 9, 2007
    SW Arkansas
    Is it too much to ask that they follow certain house rules?

    I like things a certain way in my house. For example, dishes are done as soon as the meal is complete. Doing the dishes includes wiping down the stove, countertops and the placemats on the table. That's the way I was raised. To do otherwise is to encourage bugs - roaches and ants - to move in. And if I prepare the entire meal by myself, I expect help with cleaning up. If someone else prepares the meal I'd be more than happy to do dishes, I really don't mind cleaning up my own mess. It is NOT acceptable to leave the mornings dishes until that evening. We don't have a dishwasher, nor do I feel the need for one.
    Also, if you have a dog (that's not housebroken) the dog should stay where DH and I ask that he be kept - in the kitchen, so we aren't finding little surprises all over the house.

    Are these two things too much to ask? Am I being a control freak?
    Last edited: Aug 19, 2010
  2. CT_Todd

    CT_Todd Chirping

    Aug 5, 2010
    Hebron, CT
    Quote:No it's not but your should be telling this to your house guest instead of posting on the internet..?[​IMG]
  3. gritsar

    gritsar Cows, Chooks & Impys - OH MY!

    Nov 9, 2007
    SW Arkansas
    Quote:No it's not but your should be telling this to your house guest instead of posting on the internet..?[​IMG]

    I know, but I'm really just venting. Something I've learned is very helpful (for the tips I get) and stress-relieving. I have alot of friends that I've met on BYC. [​IMG]
  4. cluckcluck42

    cluckcluck42 Songster

    Oct 4, 2009
    One thing I have learned from living with people is I do not like living with people.

    It's so annoying to have to deal with other people in YOUR sanctuary. I am not as clean as you, we let our dishes go for a day or two (there are only two of us after all) but if I was a guest in someones house you bet your butt I would be on my best dish cleaning behaviour.

    SMACK SMACK SMACK to your inconsiderate guests. And I hope YOU are not cleaning up THEIR dogs poop.
  5. NeeleysAVLChicks

    NeeleysAVLChicks Songster

    Aug 4, 2009
    Leicester, NC
    Gosh Grit, I'm going through the exact same thing! We have some friends who were needing an temporary (read: TEMPORARY) place to stay while they were transitioning from their old house to their new place, the move in date on the new place originally was two weeks after their move out date on the old place. Two weeks, no big deal, right? Well two weeks has now turned into a month, which now will be turning into 6 weeks as their move in date keeps getting pushed back.

    I love these folks, they're great, but the dishes are driving me nuts! We don't have a dishwasher either and I feel the same way as you, after dinner, do the dishes, wipe down the counters, etc. Just leave it how you found it! Not only am I cooking twice as much, but I feel like I'm doing 4x more dishes, I don't understand it! And if I don't do them, they won't get done. Everybody (DH included) has been looking at this as a fun summer camp type deal, while I'm left picking up everyone else's mess.

    Luckily, I don't have to deal with the dog poop issue, but that might cause me to lose it!

    I can commiserate, I certainly can. Not that I don't love them, but man, am I looking forward to waving goodbye as they leave.
  6. redhen

    redhen Kiss My Grits... Premium Member

    May 19, 2008
    Western MA
    Ugh.. and idea how long they'll be with you? Is there a light at the end of the tunnel?...
  7. Sonoran Silkies

    Sonoran Silkies Flock Mistress

    Jan 4, 2009
    Tempe, Arizona
    Do y'all eat meals together? If so, at the end of the meal, say "Okay, everyone take their own dishes to the sink and grab one extra dish. XXX, how about putting away the leftovers, YYY, would you prefer to wash or dry?

    If y'all eat meals separately, you need to nicely tell them your expectations. Possibly post a list of chores and who is responsible for what.
  8. Nope, not at all.

    We've had several long term guests... familial guilt used to get in... with KK I don't blame her in the least, but her mom... but with my Aunt and her boys... good grief but that was stressful... food, clothes, crap everywhere... general gripes but the three that did me in...

    1 Not wearing shirts... okay, I get it, it's hot. I'm hot too. But I don't bring my exposed hairy armpits to the dining table. [​IMG]

    2 Aunt couldn't be bothered to even put in applications for work, n'mind actually working to contribute. But, she did have food stamps so you'd think their food covered? Nope, they blew it on daily allotments of Dr Pepper and Chips... and no, they would not share with anyone else in the house. But had no problem plopping down and eating at our table... eating like pigs... yet griping the whole time about the horrible food... particularly the veggies... that they had to put up with.

    3 Taking over the computers in the house. To the point where DH had to BEG just to be able to do his coursework. And, when he finally DID get HIS computer back it was covered in DrP and Hot Cheeto goop... they do not respect the no eating outside the Kitchen/Dining at all. OY, even found all sorts of stuff in the kids rooms after they left. A wonder we weren't infested with bugs. Finally we banned everyone from The Study. Sign on the door, get permission Each Time... etc. Boy did that earn some griping. Oddly not from our kids (who'd been getting booted by the boys right out) but from the 'guests'

    but 4 broke this camel's back. The kids both have bunks, we said Aunt in with DD, and the boys could alternate between the two bunks and the two couches in the house between the three of them... Came into DD's room to find all three of them camped in there... Evidently waited until me and DH went to bed, then made themselves at home. No idea how long THAT had been going on. Aunt and younger (same age as our DS, 10 then takes Mama's boy to a really creepy -IMHO- level) in bottom bed, and elder (14) on her floor. She was upset because she couldn't find a way down from her top bunk to go pee without stepping on someone... I grabbed her, said VERY loudly "You will NOT sleep with boys in your room" (not directed at her, she knew that) and then very loudly slammed the door.

    They made arrangements to move the next morning. Couldn't stand my 'meanness".

    So... yeah... we know ALL about long term guests... think the trick is to make them so uncomfortable that getting their own place, even if that means work *gasp* is the lesser of two evils.
  9. darkmatter

    darkmatter Songster

    Jul 10, 2009
    Quote:Relatives/parasites, what's the difference. The next time I hear "but you can afford it" I'm moving out and they can pay the bills.
  10. Godsgrl

    Godsgrl Ostrich wrangler

    Aug 27, 2007
    at the zoo usually
    Your house, your rules, and guests should abide by this.

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