Illnesses, bullying..should I homeschool? Long rant

Discussion in 'Family Life - Stories, Pictures & Updates' started by Sammysmom, Mar 18, 2009.

  1. Sammysmom

    Sammysmom Chillin' With My Peeps

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    Jul 15, 2008
    Saint Johns, AZ
    So my one and only child started kindergarten this year. Two weeks into the year, he got sick. Okay, fine. He's an only, I'm a stay at home mom and he never went to preschool so his immune system came under attack from all the other little germ machines. I understand this, to a degree. He has been sick off and on all year. He gets sick, we go to the doctor, he takes his med and gets better and goes back to school. Two weeks later, repeat. Mind you, this boy never had an ear infection his entire life until he started school. And as if the illnesses weren't bad enough, his first month in school, another child threw a book at him and he ended up with a cut by his eye. Approximately a week after that, the same child attempted to choke my son. That issue seemed to get resolved. Now, I'm seeing him coming home with bruises and scratches he didn't have when he left in the morning. Believe me, I am not a mom that thinks her child can do no wrong or that freaks out over every little injury. After all, he's a boy and does play rough. But when I ask him how he got such and such mark and he replies that ******* scratched him and spit on him or that ****** hit him, I tend to get upset. Now I have a child that used to love going to school and now would prefer to stay home. When I asked him the other day if he would like to stay home and have me teach him rather than going to school he said yes. I asked him, "Wouldn't you miss any of the other kids?" He replied, "No, I would just miss Preston."(his best friend). This breaks my heart. Even as I write this, tears are streaming down my face. My husband and I have raised our son to respect other people and to be polite and kind. Apparently, this has played right into the hands of bullies. I never thought I would be having to deal with something like this in kindergarten. Kindergarten! For cying out loud!

    This afternoon I am going to talk to his teacher. Hopefully, we can get this under control for the rest of the year. Here is where I need advice of other homeschooling moms. I am seriously considering homeschooling him next year and would like to know about your experiences. Have you found any drawbacks? Was it difficult for your child to accept you teaching them?

    I'm sorry this post is so long. I waited 16 years to have this child, went through infertility treatments, four miscarriages and a tubal pregnancy before God blessed us with this amazing boy.
     
  2. willowcol

    willowcol Chillin' With My Peeps

    Oct 10, 2008
    Macclesfield NC
    I didn't have a problem with my children seeing me as the teacher during school time and they were in middle school whe we started homeschooling. It will be up to you to decide if homeschooling will be best for you, there are good and bad and both sides. If you are a stay at home mom and want to really know what is going on I would just go to the school. When my children were in kindergarden I would go to the school 2 to 3 times a week for a few hours and help in the classroom. This would stop any child from picking on your child because they never know when you will be coming in, also it helps the teacher and anything that helps the teachers helps the students.
     
  3. PamsPride

    PamsPride Chillin' With My Peeps

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    Nov 19, 2008
    OHIO
    I vote for home schooling!

    My children went to public school for four years. After one year of homeschooling I asked them if they wanted to go back to public school and they said NO WAY!!
    You can always try it and if you find that it is not working you can always send him back to public school.
     
  4. NancyDz

    NancyDz Chillin' With My Peeps

    Oct 9, 2008
    Dutch Flat, CA
    I think homeschooling can be good but it really depends on you. My boyfriend has a 16 year old son and an ex-wife with a teaching degree that has homeschooled their son ( they've been split since he was two years old) Unfortunately the ex-wife is either lazy, agoraphobic or both and his son is not doing well.

    He has NO social skills , is 16 going on about 10, has no idea of the real world. His mom lets him "make his own schedule" so the kid stays up til 2 0r 3am and sleeps in until noon. Granted he is book smart and is well above his grade level but now she's talking about having him take the GED to finish??? This kid stays indoors 99% of the time, and when my bf tries to take him to do outdoors things or try something different the kid throws a fit. The only outside activity he does is a fencing class but he stays in the level 1 with the 10-12 year olds because he doesnt fell comfortable in the level 2 which is kids his own age!

    I know you probably think that my bf should just be able to demand that some things be done different but his ex is a very stubborn woman and unless he takes her to court which unfortunately he does not have the $$ for, she doesnt listen to anything he has to say. It's a weird situation with a lot of factors but bottom line is.. I think the kid in this situation would be much more capable of getting out on his own if he had gone to a regular school. He did participate in a lot of activities with other home schoolers when he was younger but doesnt want to and doesnt get pushed to now that he's a teen and needs interaction most. He seems to think he can make millions making video games... but my bf is a computer guy and what the kid knows is
    VERY basic. If he was around peers he would know that but at the rate he's progressing he'll be living at home til he's 40 before he ventures out in the world. I'm sure this is an extreme case but whatever you do make sure your kid knows how to socialize and isnt so sheltered. Good luck!
     
  5. crait

    crait Chillin' With My Peeps

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    Jul 9, 2008
    Dallas, Texas
    There's been many studies suggesting homeschooling is academically equal to regular school. However, home schooled students, especially at younger ages before high school do not get the social skills needed. I'm not saying every home school kid is a sociopath or anything, I'm just saying that home schooling has its disadvantages that you need to highly consider.
    I would recommend giving your child extra vitamins everyday and re-evaluate your options around the middle of next school year during winter break.
    Your child needs to come in contact with other people, places, and pathogens and keeping him in school will help him do this. His immune system will get stronger- you'll see.
    By next year he'll be fine.
     
  6. Rhett&SarahsMom

    Rhett&SarahsMom Chillin' With My Peeps

    May 8, 2008
    I am considering homeschooling as well at this point. While we dont have a problem with bullies in her class this year, I am sure the coming years will be bad as they increase the class sizes due to budget shortfalls and mismanagement. I have already told my dd not to start something, but she has every right and my permission to finish it.

    As far as illnesses. While my dd never went to pre school it wasnt like she never went and hung out with other kids.We went to playgroups etc and most of those were daycare kids. And parents send kids to daycare sick all the time. Hoof and mouth spread like wildfire last summer. But this year as far as illness goes. OMG [​IMG]

    I have mentioned home schooling to her. She doesnt want to. Right now she says she will miss her friends. My only other option will be sending her to another town for school. But I have no idea as to how to even START that. I am sure the school super in my city will not be forthcoming with that info. If private school wasnt so darn $$$$ I would be sending her there. But KG alone was over 3 grand. [​IMG]
    And those teachers dont even have to be licensed!
     
  7. illinichick

    illinichick Chillin' With My Peeps

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    Mar 31, 2008
    SE Il
    As a H.S. teacher, I have observed this; Home schooling is only as successful as the parent makes it. We've had students return from homeschooling that are WAY behind their grade level and a few that are ahead. Most Homeschoolers return to H.S. to get their driver's license. When we get one, we have to test them to see where their reading, writing and math level are at. The other problem that we see are the poor socialization skills. If someone homeschools, there needs to be some place for interaction, such as church events.
     
  8. crait

    crait Chillin' With My Peeps

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    Jul 9, 2008
    Dallas, Texas
    Quote:This is right on the money.
    As for being a highschool student myself, I observe this daily.
     
  9. Ellie_NY_chick

    Ellie_NY_chick Chillin' With My Peeps

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    Jul 1, 2008
    Finger Lakes, NY
    If you homeschool him, there are many other ways he can develop relationships with children his own age and develop these very important social skills.

    Apparently there is no supervision at this school. Bullying should be recognized by a supervising adult and stopped immediately, especially in a child this age. Who on earth is NOT watching your what - 5 year old child, I'm guessing?

    I'd be outraged.

    I think homeschooling is great. I'd do it. The family up the street homeschooled their children and they are fantastic kids. They are involved in other activities, and the great part is YOU get to choose who your kid hangs out with. In a public school setting he is exposed to every miscreant in town.

    You can't do anything about the way other people raise their kids, but it doesn't mean you have to have your child exposed to that.

    There are LOTS of things your child can do socially outside of the school setting, such as 4H, church, sports leagues, clubs, and art classes. The homeschool community is very supportive and can help you, I'm sure.

    Not to scare you, but I'd yank my kid out of there and report these incidents to the school board and the state. Obviously there isextremely poor adult supervision if your child has been choked, hit, taunted and harrassed in a time frame of less than one year and he's in KINDERGARDEN.

    Meanwhile, I'd spend time in that classroom until the end of the year. That was a great suggestion.

    Good luck - let us know how it works out. [​IMG]
     
  10. Rhett&SarahsMom

    Rhett&SarahsMom Chillin' With My Peeps

    May 8, 2008
    Quote:or youth sports(we have soccer, baseball, softball, deck hockey, hockey, figure skating teams and gymnastic teams locally), boy scouts, girl scouts, local YWCA, 4H and other local clubs that may be in your area or interest your child. During the summer and school vacations dance studios, the local art gallery and some local orchards and parks have programs that dont require you or your family to be a member of anything to participate. [​IMG]

    edited to add 4H. And if you dont have one in your area or one that doesnt interest your child you can always start one yourself. [​IMG]
     
    Last edited: Mar 18, 2009

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