Genie: "What has brought you to awaken me from my long slumber?!" Farmer: "I recently got divorced from my less-than-wonderful wife." Genie: "DIVORCE? Because you're divorced, whatever you wish for, you wife gets double." Farmer: "You got to be kiddin' me! She already got everything!" Genie: "Sorry, those are the rules." Farmer: "Alright, if that's the way it's gonna be, for my first wish, I would like $100 million." Genie: "Your wish is my command! ...but your wife now has $200 million!" Farmer: "That's fine. I can live with that. For my second wish, I want the biggest mansion on Lake Champlain." Genie: "Your wish is my command! ....but your wife now has 2 mansions on Lake Champlain." Farmer: "Mmmmmm....now for my THIRD wish! ............... ...Genie, for my third wish I would like you to beat me HALF to death!"