Kids that don't grow up

Discussion in 'Random Ramblings' started by seminolewind, Aug 4, 2014.

  1. seminolewind

    seminolewind Flock Mistress Premium Member

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    DH is on the phone right now with his 32 year old son who never had to work for a thing in his life (parents divorced). Multiple jobs the last 10 years and finally decided to go to school so hubby foot the bill. He is graduated now as a respiratory therapist. Not working yet. He's asking for "back-up emergency money" for his 600 mile trip. I was pinching hubby to say no, which he did. Hubby just had to retire, and leave a job due to a medical issue. He's not been well for months. He is just now feeling better.

    I can't believe the audacity of some kids. They need a good kick in the butt. My daughter put herself thru school . Never asked me for a dime. There were times I had to force some money on her for important things. I just really need to vent. I could scream. How is he even paying for this road trip? If he gets a dime from hubby, I will raise bloody murder.
     
  2. sunflower4you

    sunflower4you Chillin' With My Peeps

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    I am about the age of your DH's son and can I say that I feel the same way, only about other people my age? (not about my kids because they are young yet) [​IMG] I can't stand to watch a freeloader that makes bad choices when I have made sacrifices to make good choices my whole life. I don't want to get on a soapbox, though...Jesus said forgive, and I try to remember the story of the prodigal son when I start getting frustrated.
     
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  3. seminolewind

    seminolewind Flock Mistress Premium Member

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    Good for you! You have every right to stand on a soapbox. His other son is 36. Thru HS he worked at Taco Bell, so not only did he smell like tacos, he walked a mile to work every day. Went to school, graduated, got a job. Now he just bought himself a home. I am very proud of him. My daughter never asked me for a dime. Did it all on her own. Now she's a nurse.

    I can't stand watching anyone take advantage of a parent or freeload.
     
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  4. b.hromada

    b.hromada Flock Mistress

    I hear you! Good for you and hubby for sticking to your guns! [​IMG] Kids today think the world owes them something. [​IMG]
     
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  5. The Yakima Kid

    The Yakima Kid Cirque des Poulets

    Thank God DH said "no."

    I lost a good friend because she asked me her opinion about her adult son who lives at home with her. He has illegitimate children by two different women. He was allowed to move in with her, his stepfather, and the two younger boys from her second marriage. She even bought him contraceptives, and apparently one of his Baby Mamas is pregnant again despite a considerable investment in preventives on her part. My friend asked my opinion, as she runs her own business and spends a lot of time helping out with her grandchildren, and her son wanted her to pay for an apartment for him and his Baby Mama. Her second husband views stepson as a leech as stepson was allowed to move in on condition he complete his GED and he apparently hasn't done much in the way of studying anything other than his Baby Mama's anatomy and the contents of the refrigerator.

    I told her what I thought - that the continuing damage to her second marriage is not a good thing; that she let this mid-20s high school dropout move in on the condition he complete his GED - and after far more than a year he hasn't done so - in fact his main achievement is impregnating one of his Baby Mamas again.

    We aren't friends anymore. Apparently she wanted sympathy, not a reality check and advice.
     
  6. 1muttsfan

    1muttsfan Overrun With Chickens

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    "Backup Emergency Money" sounds a lot like "Money that an Emergency will Cause Me to Spend"
     
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  7. seminolewind

    seminolewind Flock Mistress Premium Member

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    Yakima Kid, I will bet a lot of people don't want to hear or don't want to understand what an enabler is. Kids are excellent learners when it comes to manipulating parents. It's probably a blessing that you won't need to hear continuous whining about the friend and her son.

    I have one who talks hours non stop about her medical problems. I kind of avoid her now, LOL.
     
  8. mimischicksnat

    mimischicksnat Chillin' With My Peeps

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    I got accused of "throwing my son under the bus" because I would not "enable" him. This person was going to be his savior. Ended up not happening because of the danger it could have caused to the rest of the family involved....just sayin'

    BTW, this person can't even take care of herself, let alone my son.
     
    Last edited: Aug 11, 2014
  9. seminolewind

    seminolewind Flock Mistress Premium Member

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    One just can't imagine how painful it is to an enabler to stop their behavior. I guess excuses are easier than giving your own kid the boot.
     
  10. The Yakima Kid

    The Yakima Kid Cirque des Poulets

    I tried to point out to her that there was a difference between the family down the street who let their offspring move in for a year while attending graduate school and her son who hasn't even begun to work on his GED.

    Sigh.
     
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