Confidentially from me to you, my marriage is in trouble. We had our first counseling session last night and I'm stunned at the conclusions the therapist said at the end. So ... I need your input. First some background: I'm almost 50, have a 14 year old, and have been married for 4 years. I was a single mom for 10 years, struggling but making it on my own. My son is homeschooled and is special-needs: ADHD, OCD, has a math learning disability, is autistic and epilepsy. We have 2 acres, 4 adult goats, 4 newborn goat babies, and about 60 chicks/chickens. Soon to get a seizure response dog. Question: who's needs are number one in your family: your spouse or your child(ren). Question: when a spouse comes into a ready-made family, should that new spouse (who's never had any parenting or long-term relationship experience) be expected to step in and be a 50% co-parent? Question: when a spouse is away from the home, for the job, 5 days out of 7, is that considered a separation? Question: when you have a small farm with a garden, chickens and goats, and that spouse comes home on the weekend, is it ok for that spouse to expect 2 days of rest and relaxation and NOT do chores, maintenance or other farm-related things? Question: when there is more than one adult living on a farm/farmette, are the adults supposed to know what to do or is there a chore-list-maker? Shouldn't the adults just step up and do what needs to be done? Question for you women who have hit menopause: when you have no desire because there's no hormones going and your husband acts like a petulant child, do you say "no sex" or just do it to avoid the inevitable argument? I'm sure I have more questions but this'll do for now. Thank you. ETA: Thought I'd change the title to more reflect what this topic has morphed to.