Mom doesn't acknowledge that I have a job - what would you say?

Discussion in 'Random Ramblings' started by lengel, Jun 9, 2008.

  1. lengel

    lengel Chillin' With My Peeps

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    I have a company that I run out of my home. It is mostly computer based and the income is highly variable depending on the time of year, the year itself etc. Some years/months I make really good money. Some years/months, not so good. It all evens out and just requires a bit of planning.

    Mom doesn't get this concept. Since I can't tell her my monthly salary, she acts as if I don't have a job.

    Just talked to her this evening and I'm a bit discouraged, mostly because we were talking about the economy. I think it's easier to hear when the month or year is "off" but the business is doing really well right now so I had a hard time with the fact that she doesn't think that I earn money. She literally says that I just need to wait for DH to bring home the paycheck!!

    I never say anything other than pointing out that I do contribute to the household income and then I change the subject.

    What would you do? I'm 40 and she's 68. Also, her knowledge of computers is just slightly more than turning on the machine . . .
     
  2. Wildsky

    Wildsky Wild Egg!

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    I wouldn't even bother to argue or talk about it.... [​IMG]

    Not sure why it makes a difference - you're an adult, why do you need to defend anything?
     
  3. lengel

    lengel Chillin' With My Peeps

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    Quote:I think because she acts as if we could lose everything at any moment. This is so far from the truth but I can't prove it to her.

    When I told her that we were trading eggs with our neighbors for honey and produce, she told me to set up a farm stand so that I could fund an enormously expensive project on our home. A farm stand won't do that. Marketing my company will. But we can't seem to have that conversation. She understands selling eggs by the dozen, but not computer products.

    She just seems really stressed and I hate it.

    Edit: I'm also unhappy that she isn't proud of me. Maybe some of us never grow out of that.
     
    Last edited: Jun 10, 2008
  4. d.k

    d.k red-headed stepchild

    * Add up your income last year, divide by 12 and if she asks again use that figure. My DH is an auto tech whose paychecks also vary week to week, in tourist season and out. So do oodles of other professions nowdays. He is only guaranteed 2O hours a week, and even that guarantee is rare in his line of work. (P.S.- You may want to think about actually cutting yourself a base paycheck, if at all possible, and set up a company 'bonus' schedule to cover extra income. My folks have their own business, too, and that is how their accountant recommended it.)
     
    Last edited: Jun 10, 2008
  5. lengel

    lengel Chillin' With My Peeps

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    That's a good idea. Thank you. My head is in the details I suppose.
     
  6. PurpleChicken

    PurpleChicken Tolerated.....Mostly

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    Some folks, like my parents, just can't grasp that you can make a living without
    going to a job 5 days a week and collecting a paycheck with someone else's name
    on it.

    When I was self employed it bugged the heck out of me that they felt the same
    way your mom does. It's not supposed to bother us but it does.

    So, if it helps, I understand.
     
  7. lengel

    lengel Chillin' With My Peeps

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    Thanks! I have a secret plan to get filthy rich so maybe that will make an impression. [​IMG]
     
  8. d.k

    d.k red-headed stepchild

    * Ummm, I think almost everybody has a similiar plan. I have one-- about three times a month!!! At the moment, I'm planning 'the perfect' chicken waterer!! [​IMG] [​IMG] Best wishes with yours!
     
  9. Mini Coop

    Mini Coop Chillin' With My Peeps

    If you're 40 and your mom is over 60, then it's time to cut the cord, me thinks. Tell your mom that I think you are really ingenius to be able to work from home and make substantial income doing so.
     
  10. lengel

    lengel Chillin' With My Peeps

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    Quote:I need to ask you a question and I'm very serious. When you say "cut the cord", do you mean that I shouldn't care about what she says?

    This is very important for me. We do not have a traditional parent/child relationship.
     

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