Mom's pregnant again... UPDATE post 44

[Raiquee]

Eenie you sound very grown up for your age. I was only 1 of 3 (well 1 of 4, mom lost him a few days before he was born. tied a knot in his umbilical cord

..) But I still had to take care of my baby brother. Changing diapers, watching both kids when I was 13, picking them up from the school bus. I guess if I wasn't spending the time watching them, I would be doing other chores.

Maybe you can talk to your mother and ask her if the next sibilings down (second oldest) could take on some responsibility of the new baby too? Changing diapers/feeding a baby isn't too hard. I know its the pits, but, you can't fly through life without being given responsibility. You'll find yourself in the real world and not having a clue how to act. My son is only 3 and he has chores. All it is, is feeding the ducks and putting his dishes in the sink...but he still has them.

I think its fine for older children to help with younger kids. I mean not to the point that they are the mother, but some help is warranted. Brings out the "looking out for you" insticts in kids. Little brother can look to big brother for help. Big brother can protect little brother when he goes to school. etc.

 

[6chickens in St. Charles]

Is the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence?

I tell you truly, I am miserably lonely. I have 2 brothers and one mom, and only one of those brothers talks with me. I often wish I had come from MORE family, as my 3 children have nobody but themselves. Rare visits to or from family, rare get togethers, nobody even wants their school pictures so we stopped ordering them. (I have thousands of their pictures on my iphone though) The day my eldest graduated from 8th grade was actually depressing, as we had nobody to invite while he seemed surrounded by throngs of visitors attending parties of his classmates, aunts and uncles, grandparents, cousins.............but all he has is his mom, dad and 2 brothers. Actually we invited my mom and brother but they didn't want to come. If we had more people to invite, there'd be more opportunities, see?

I envy people with lots of family.

So here I am on the other side, feeling my own misery while you're on that side feeling yours. Maybe the grass will always be greener on the other side of the fence?

 

[HorseFeatherz NV]

Your always welcome here for a break (and to hide from Em

).................no kids, just critters.

 

[australorpchick]

Quote:
x 2

 

[LittleChickenLady]

Quote:
I would suggest you are more careful in choosing your words.

Why? They made a very valid point.

 

[Tanichca]

Well, I already talked about this in tour last email, but I have one thing to add. No matter what you feel like, please treat your younger siblings with love! So many of my physiological problems come from the fact that my oldest sister despises me... If you show love and respect to even these annoying little kids, they will adore you, and you will be great friends all your lives! Just my two cents.

 

[Tanichca]

Quote:
Well, even though my family does have some financial trouble, we chose to have ten kids. As the oldest kid most of the time (older bro in school, older sister doesn't give a dang) I have to babysit, feed, change, bathe, watch.... But I don't regret any of it. We always have what we need, and taking care of kids now, even the difficult ones, gives me great practice for later in life when a coworker is a brat or when I have kids of my own.

we fix the school issue by homeschooling.

 

[suzettex5]

Quote:
I would suggest you are more careful in choosing your words.

Why? They made a very valid point.

NO, they DID NOT make any 'valid' point. What they made was a general statement based on stereo typing and ignorance. Yes, some people 'may' be casual about having more or any kids, but MOST people who actually THINK about it before hand (before the BC fails or whatever) ARENT being casual or flippant, They are actually THINKING about it first.

Should people in poor economical situations that arent set to change for them directly have more children? Not in MY opinion, but I sure cant stop 'em. I feel bad for the kids, but usually things turn out ok.

I am probably only responding to this comment because I have 5 kids, one on the way, and between my hubby and I we have 'soon to be' 9 children. Yup, NINE. I DONT apologise or feel bad about it one bit. We DONT use Government asst. whatsoever, our grown kids are ALL productive, employed people, and we DO have the income to sustain our family. If we love to have babies, and raise children, and look forward to large family reunions, who's to say we are doing anything wrong? There are alot of people who have large families that CAN support them and raise them right. One can HARDLY blame people with large families for the overcrowded schools, etc. That is a failure of our government, and the fact that our country currently has an unsupportable population of , shall we say, 'refugees' that are not registered as legal citizens.

A bad economy is not going to be solved by reduced reproduction. Fewer consumers means less money in circulation, fewer goods bought and sold is NOT good for the economy.

There is nothing wrong with older children helping with the younger ones, or just helping around the house. When mom and dad let the older kid do MORE than they do, thats when its not right and not fair. Honestly, my 2 older kids do have to help alot, BUT, they get the BIG rewards, like Iphones (we pay the bill) trips to theme parks, video game systems and games, even a family trip to Hawaii where they brought a friend (we paid for that too), so there is certainly a fair amount of reward for being the big helper around our house.

 

[DuckyGurl]

Guys, I really do not think this arguing is helping Eenie. In the least. Please just be supportive of her.

Eenie, I know how you feel. But just think of how a new baby will feel nestled in your arms. Being the oldest is tough. Hang in there.

 

[SarahFair]

I grew up with 1 sister. I wish I had more as it can be lonely at gatherings.
My mothers side had 5 kids and it was my favorite thing going to my grandmas at xmas and thanksgiving. SO much laughter and good food.

Ive only got 2 myself and my SO doesnt want anymore (though I long for a big family).
Consider yourself lucky

It may be a lot of hard work but hard work usually pays off