My best friend has breast cancer

Discussion in 'Family Life - Stories, Pictures & Updates' started by I have WHAT in my yard?, Jan 19, 2010.

  1. I have WHAT in my yard?

    I have WHAT in my yard? Chillin' With My Peeps

    Jun 24, 2008
    Eggberg, PA
    She just found out yesterday that the lump was malignant. [​IMG]

    I feel horrible for her. I know the survival rate is really, really high, but she has had these lumps for over a year and now her lymph nodes are swollen. Last year when she told the doc about her lump her said it was scar tissue. [​IMG]

    So, now we start the journey. She won't contact any support groups but she is talking to other people who have survived.

    She's not married, has no family nearby, I live two hours away...... I can't even go to her tests with her! Any suggestions on how to be supportive from here??
  2. ruffles

    ruffles Chillin' With My Peeps

    Jun 26, 2009
    First of all I am so angry at the Physician for not doing further tests.

    Never, never do most Physicians just assume it is scar tissue.

    Also, I need to ask why did not your friend do some research, a second opinion??

    I am upset for your friend.

    Now, check with any cnacer group in her area, many have volunteers that will help with transport.

    If she is going to be home for awhile, perhaps she can qualify for home help , a Visiting Nurse and a Home health aide.

    She needs to contact a local cancer support group to begin the process of getting help/

    She may be fine after her treatments, she may not become too ill, may be able to function on limited basis.

    If she is not working perhaps some short term disability may help out.

    Many local hospitals have support groups so does the cancer society
  3. gritsar

    gritsar Cows, Chooks & Impys - OH MY!

    Nov 9, 2007
    SW Arkansas
    I'm so sorry to hear that. Best wishes for your friend. [​IMG]
  4. redhen

    redhen Kiss My Grits... Premium Member

    May 19, 2008
    Western MA
    So sorry! [​IMG] And bad doctor!! [​IMG]
    She'll be in my thoughts! [​IMG] [​IMG]
  5. I have WHAT in my yard?

    I have WHAT in my yard? Chillin' With My Peeps

    Jun 24, 2008
    Eggberg, PA
    Quote:Like many, if not most women, she had no reason to doubt or distrust her doctor. She had no sense that there was anything wrong, so when he said scar tissue she thought he was right. It wasn't until they got bigger that she grew concerned and went back - he then insisted it was a cyst. Then she pushed him for the tests and here we are. We are getting her another doctor. First and foremost on the list.

    The problems with her (in many areas of her life) is she won't reach out for help. She got angry at me when I said contact the local survivors group - I knew there would be help out there... It is perhaps too soon. Any thoughts on what should happen next so I know what to help her prepare for?
  6. chixie

    chixie Chillin' With My Peeps

    Apr 6, 2009
    kountze texas
    prayers sent for your friend... hopig for a speedy recovery...hugs
  7. 92caddy

    92caddy Egg Lover

    May 18, 2007
    Portland, IN
    Prayers to your friend. No matter what, just be there for her, weather it be talking or holding. If she wants to kick and scream, let her do it to you, no offence on the kicking. When my mom had it, I told her that what ever she wanted to do, let me know, I would be her tree if she wanted to cut one down, her rock if she wanted to throw one, her shovel if she wanted to dig a hole, her bag if she wanted to kick something, her shoulder to cry on, HER WHATEVER, all she had to do was say it and it was hers. God knows, I wanted to do all of those things, and it wasnt me that had the cancer, but I knew if I felt like that, then she had to also, so I made it clear that whatever she wanted or needed, she could depend on me no matter what. Even when she wanted to be left alone. Be strong and stay strong for yourself and for her sake. ...............

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