Quick background, my mom was laid off from work and her health insurance ended in December. She is a VERY independent woman and does not like the idea of being taken care of or given hand-outs...for ANY reason. I told her that she is living with me in old age. She told me that I BETTER put her in a nursing home because she is will be darned if she burdens DH and I like that. I don't think so! DH said the same thing as me! So, here's the issue. She emails me today saying that she found a lump in her breast a few weeks ago, but since she doesn't have insurance she isn't going to the doctors (and wouldn't tell me so I don't get worried). Well, she only told her boyfriend at first (of a couple years, but doesn't see the need to get married right now) and last weekend, she was out with her boyfriend, my dad and some of their friends (side note...yes, my parents divorced 26 years ago and they share friends. My mom's bf is one of my dad's best friends. No, there is no drama...I consider myself lucky that they get along now!). Well, she told my dad and it pretty much came down to if she didn't tell me, he would...so she told me. Her mom had breast cancer a few years ago, but at the the time, the doc said it isn't genetic. My mom is 49, but in menopause due to a hysterectomy 13 years ago. (According to the doc, post-menopausal breast cancer isn't genetic. ) Anyway...she says it feels like it is going down in size (after several weeks), so maybe it is a cyst (her hoping to avoid the doc/insurance issue). I said, go get a physical and mammogram! If she signs up quick enough with insurance, she won't have an issue since you have a grace period between insurance companies (commonly 60 days) before it becomes an issue. Well, being unemployed, she won't get insurance since it will cost $300-400/month. I just about finished my Master's degree and make a decent enough income and while DH is unemployed, the unemployment income and my income are enough to make things work. I told her that I will pay for the insurance...no issues, get the insurance, and we will pay for it 100%. Her parents offered to help out too, so they could probably help with copays, etc. She says she doesn't want to be in debt and won't do it. I told her she has to spend money to be in debt. You can't owe money on nothing! Her excuse is that DH and I have had tough finances since DH was unemployed while I was finishing up my classes for school, so money has been tight. Yea...but, classes are over and I am working now! So, we may not be able to pay off the credit card as quickly as intended...we will still be paying it off well enough! DH and I are both very good with money, so I am not worried! An extra 6 months to pay off the card is worth getting my mom health insurance! Her final response..."call me tomorrow...or maybe we'll talk about it this weekend. Love you, Sweetie! Sleep well and have a good day at work tomorrow!". Why can't she just take it? I definitely have her stubbornness and hate hand-outs, but I am fightin' this one! I'd rather her get told by a doc that it is nothing, then her do nothing and lose her! Post-meopausal breast cancer may not be genetic, but stubbornness sure is!