My Son - Lance Corporal Richard Ellis, 01/26/80 - 08/06/99, RIP

Discussion in 'Family Life - Stories, Pictures & Updates' started by Sjisty, Jul 29, 2009.

  1. Sjisty

    Sjisty Scribe of Brahmalot

    May 18, 2009
    Hi all - I would like to share a little about my son, Richard. I'm sorry if this becomes a little long. I lost him on August 6, 1999, so we are coming up on 10 years and as usual at this time of year I'm not doing so well.

    I had two beautiful children, Richard and Julie. Their father divorced us all when they were 12 (Richard) and 10 (Julie). He left and never looked back. Richard, Julie and I became the "Three Musketeers" - us against the world! We had a good life, just the three of us.

    Richard wanted to be a Marine. He joined the delayed entry program. The week after he graduated high school (National Honor Society, 4.0 average), the Marines came to our door and took him to boot camp. He broke his foot while there, so was there for a prolonged time, coming home the beginning of December 1998. He left again for his MOS training on New Year's Eve, 1998, the last time I ever saw him.

    He enjoyed his MOS training, calling me often and writing letters. I was so proud - my baby was becoming a man! He graduated second in his class, and was on his way home for a month on leave. He was so anxious to get here that he did not want to stop and so got drowsy behind the wheel and fell asleep. They tell me a nurse witnessed the accident, which only involved him, and went to deliver first aid, but it was too late, so he didn't suffer.

    The Marines actually do come to your door to tell you the news. They were very nice and I hated every one of them! In time, the Staff Sgt. who came out became a good friend.

    My daughter, Julie, had to have psychologic assistance for a while. I probably should have, too, but didn't. I don't remember a lot about that time.

    I do remember their father came to the memorial service - it was at the Marine base in Tampa. Poor Julie became hysterical upon seeing her father and started hyperventilating. We almost had to call an ambulance for her, but we got her calmed down. The Staff Sgt. told my ex that he could watch the service from a window overlooking the parade grounds. They placed a guard at the door and told him if he tried to leave the room they would call the city Police and have him escorted to the city limits. During the 21-gun salute, I heard a car start up and it was him leaving. He has since gone back under his rock and we haven't seen or heard from him since. They later told me that he wanted to know how much the insurance was and why he wasn't called with the news (I had tracked him down myself). They told him that every form that Richard filled out, where there was a space for his father's name, he put "unknown." As far as the insurance, they told him to ask me - he didn't.

    Julie is grown and married now and living in Texas with her husband. We are still very close, although separated by half of the U.S. She is planning to name her first son after her brother and is trying to get pregnant.

    Anyway, I'm sorry for this long sad tale. I don't mean to bring sadness into your homes, but know that it helps me to write this. I don't have many people I can tell this to. My current husband, who is a wonderful person, is very uncomfortable with emotions, so I usually keep it bottled up. It just gets worse toward the first week in August, and then I can push it back down and remember the good again.

    All you parents - go home and hug your children for me! All you children - hug your parents!

    Thanks for listening (reading).

  2. texasgal

    texasgal Brood with an Attitude

    Apr 18, 2009
    Janice ..

    I feel honored to have learned about your son .. and your family. Don't ever apologize for remembering, and telling, Richard's story. He sounds like an incredible man, brother, son.

    Do you live in FL? Because I found it ironic that your daughter is in Texas.. I'm in Texas and my parents are in FL .. Half a country away for sure.

    If you need to chat or a shoulder, this next couple weeks, or whenever .. just pm me.. I'm on here alot.

  3. Three Cedars Silkies

    Three Cedars Silkies Overrun With Chickens

    Apr 17, 2008
    Gainesville, Fl.
    Thank you...I just can't imagine...[​IMG] [​IMG]
  4. Sugar Sand Farm

    Sugar Sand Farm Chillin' With My Peeps

    Apr 24, 2007
    North Florida
    May God grant you peace. As a mother of a soldier I too fear that knock on the door. My son joined the army three years ago. Thankfully he came home safe fro his first deployment. He redeploys in November whick I am not looking forward too.
    Funny I was so depressed last night, he called me and said he was picked to leave this Friday to go out to California for desert training ahead of his company. I was depressed as I won't see him for over a month, then when he comes back he gets ready to deploy. Your post made me realize just how lucky I have been, My son is stationed nearby so he can come home most weekends. I selfishly wanted him to come home one more weekend before he left. Again I hope this next week is peaceful for you God Bless Micki
  5. steffpeck

    steffpeck Chillin' With My Peeps

    Mar 25, 2007
    Erda, UT
    [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] Thank you for sharing your story.
  6. Sillystunt

    Sillystunt Master of the Silly

    Jul 11, 2008
    Winter Haven, FL
    [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG]

    I am so sorry for your loss! I can't imagine losing a child........
    Sending you my hugs and prayers through this hard time~
    Thank you for sharing your story~
  7. Camelot Farms

    Camelot Farms Chickenista

    How proud you must be of him and all that he accomplished during his time here in your life and in your heart. He sounds like a terrific young man who got his best qualities from you.

    Thank you for sharing a part of him with all of us. I think that we are all a little bit better for it.

  8. Chicks_N_Horses

    Chicks_N_Horses Chillin' With My Peeps

    Mar 30, 2009
    South Alabama
    I am so sorry for your loss! Thanks for sharing!!

  9. KellyHM

    KellyHM Overrun With Chickens

    Sep 10, 2008
    Lakeland, FL
    So sorry for your loss. [​IMG] If you need some real hugs just head on down this way.
  10. duck walk

    duck walk Chillin' With My Peeps

    Jun 13, 2009
    white springs, fl
    Semper Fi...once a Marine, always a Marine...I am sorry for your loss...thank you for ain't easy...bless you...

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