Hi all - I would like to share a little about my son, Richard. I'm sorry if this becomes a little long. I lost him on August 6, 1999, so we are coming up on 10 years and as usual at this time of year I'm not doing so well.
I had two beautiful children, Richard and Julie. Their father divorced us all when they were 12 (Richard) and 10 (Julie). He left and never looked back. Richard, Julie and I became the "Three Musketeers" - us against the world! We had a good life, just the three of us.
Richard wanted to be a Marine. He joined the delayed entry program. The week after he graduated high school (National Honor Society, 4.0 average), the Marines came to our door and took him to boot camp. He broke his foot while there, so was there for a prolonged time, coming home the beginning of December 1998. He left again for his MOS training on New Year's Eve, 1998, the last time I ever saw him.
He enjoyed his MOS training, calling me often and writing letters. I was so proud - my baby was becoming a man! He graduated second in his class, and was on his way home for a month on leave. He was so anxious to get here that he did not want to stop and so got drowsy behind the wheel and fell asleep. They tell me a nurse witnessed the accident, which only involved him, and went to deliver first aid, but it was too late, so he didn't suffer.
The Marines actually do come to your door to tell you the news. They were very nice and I hated every one of them! In time, the Staff Sgt. who came out became a good friend.
My daughter, Julie, had to have psychologic assistance for a while. I probably should have, too, but didn't. I don't remember a lot about that time.
I do remember their father came to the memorial service - it was at the Marine base in Tampa. Poor Julie became hysterical upon seeing her father and started hyperventilating. We almost had to call an ambulance for her, but we got her calmed down. The Staff Sgt. told my ex that he could watch the service from a window overlooking the parade grounds. They placed a guard at the door and told him if he tried to leave the room they would call the city Police and have him escorted to the city limits. During the 21-gun salute, I heard a car start up and it was him leaving. He has since gone back under his rock and we haven't seen or heard from him since. They later told me that he wanted to know how much the insurance was and why he wasn't called with the news (I had tracked him down myself). They told him that every form that Richard filled out, where there was a space for his father's name, he put "unknown." As far as the insurance, they told him to ask me - he didn't.
Julie is grown and married now and living in Texas with her husband. We are still very close, although separated by half of the U.S. She is planning to name her first son after her brother and is trying to get pregnant.
Anyway, I'm sorry for this long sad tale. I don't mean to bring sadness into your homes, but know that it helps me to write this. I don't have many people I can tell this to. My current husband, who is a wonderful person, is very uncomfortable with emotions, so I usually keep it bottled up. It just gets worse toward the first week in August, and then I can push it back down and remember the good again.
All you parents - go home and hug your children for me! All you children - hug your parents!
Thanks for listening (reading).
Janice
I had two beautiful children, Richard and Julie. Their father divorced us all when they were 12 (Richard) and 10 (Julie). He left and never looked back. Richard, Julie and I became the "Three Musketeers" - us against the world! We had a good life, just the three of us.
Richard wanted to be a Marine. He joined the delayed entry program. The week after he graduated high school (National Honor Society, 4.0 average), the Marines came to our door and took him to boot camp. He broke his foot while there, so was there for a prolonged time, coming home the beginning of December 1998. He left again for his MOS training on New Year's Eve, 1998, the last time I ever saw him.
He enjoyed his MOS training, calling me often and writing letters. I was so proud - my baby was becoming a man! He graduated second in his class, and was on his way home for a month on leave. He was so anxious to get here that he did not want to stop and so got drowsy behind the wheel and fell asleep. They tell me a nurse witnessed the accident, which only involved him, and went to deliver first aid, but it was too late, so he didn't suffer.
The Marines actually do come to your door to tell you the news. They were very nice and I hated every one of them! In time, the Staff Sgt. who came out became a good friend.
My daughter, Julie, had to have psychologic assistance for a while. I probably should have, too, but didn't. I don't remember a lot about that time.
I do remember their father came to the memorial service - it was at the Marine base in Tampa. Poor Julie became hysterical upon seeing her father and started hyperventilating. We almost had to call an ambulance for her, but we got her calmed down. The Staff Sgt. told my ex that he could watch the service from a window overlooking the parade grounds. They placed a guard at the door and told him if he tried to leave the room they would call the city Police and have him escorted to the city limits. During the 21-gun salute, I heard a car start up and it was him leaving. He has since gone back under his rock and we haven't seen or heard from him since. They later told me that he wanted to know how much the insurance was and why he wasn't called with the news (I had tracked him down myself). They told him that every form that Richard filled out, where there was a space for his father's name, he put "unknown." As far as the insurance, they told him to ask me - he didn't.
Julie is grown and married now and living in Texas with her husband. We are still very close, although separated by half of the U.S. She is planning to name her first son after her brother and is trying to get pregnant.
Anyway, I'm sorry for this long sad tale. I don't mean to bring sadness into your homes, but know that it helps me to write this. I don't have many people I can tell this to. My current husband, who is a wonderful person, is very uncomfortable with emotions, so I usually keep it bottled up. It just gets worse toward the first week in August, and then I can push it back down and remember the good again.
All you parents - go home and hug your children for me! All you children - hug your parents!
Thanks for listening (reading).
Janice
