Nice Girl syndrome... so true


8 Years
Jan 27, 2011
North Alabama
I have seen several articles and books out now talking about th nice girl syndrome. IT is about how women are often raised to "be nice" and put our needs below that of others. It is not as common now thank goodness.

While women are still less likely to be violent then men, when we do become mean or violent it is much more likely to garner media attention. You see things on tv about "Mean girls"

Yet men are far more likely to be aggressive, you don't see shows dedicated to "mean boys"

so what is the american cultures obsession with female behavior why men often get away with the attitude of "boys will be boys"

in fact while women are taking on much more responsibility these days men are taking on less. There are researched and studies done on how men are becoming infantilized, usually by their own choice, and behaving more childlike, so that women are taking on traditionally male and female roles at home, working along side men in the workplace and taking on all of the responsibilities in house work and childcare, while men are regressing, becoming more likely to play games, video games, watch tv, and so on.

Some researches believe that it is because some male groups are refusing to adjust and adapt while women are. Some men are refusing to rethink what makes a man masculine, and so while traditionally masculine roles are vanishing, they are resorting to "bad behavior" as the author of "Man Up" put it.
This is leading to an interesting social backlash. Men are being needed less. As women are moving more and more into position of power (we make up 51 percent of the population) men are finding themselves needed less. More women are choosing to raise children alone, and in return men are acting out even more (This is from behaviorist studies as well as writers and researchers)

So in some ways women are rejecting the nice girls phenomenon, and yet.... falling into it stronger than ever.
here is just one (a shorter one) of many articles on the phenomenon.|htmlws-main-n|dl4|sec3_lnk1|214835


11 Years
Jul 1, 2010
Northeast Texas
Gee, do you know me? I was raised to be a "nice girl". Thanks a lot Mom. For years I was a doormat to my ex husband. I don't think anybody would accuse me of being a "nice girl" anymore.......... and no, I did not raise MY daughter to be a "nice girl".


8 Years
Apr 28, 2011
Spirit Lake
I was raised to be kind and compassionate towards others, while still having spine and standing up for myself. I am raising my daughter the same way. There should not be such a black and white mentality with how to behave. We should be nice, we should be caring, but we should also be able to make our own decisions and fend for ourselves. Marriage to your husband is supposed to be a partnership.


8 Years
May 24, 2011
Trololo farm
woops, sorry kids! I thought I edited out the bad word...


bana-bhuidseach anns gára
11 Years
Jan 16, 2009
Growing up, my mother taught me to be respectful, honest and not to be a doormat for anyone. My dad taught me I could be anything I wanted, to achieve and pursue my dreams. Together they taught me to be my own person and to ignore societies labels.

My daughter was taught the same. She and her DH are currently raising their children with the same values.

The Op's statements are true for many, and that is very disheartening.

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