Nine Pet Peeves

Discussion in 'Games, Jokes, and Fun!' started by Davaroo, Aug 6, 2009.

  1. Davaroo

    Davaroo Poultry Crank

    Feb 4, 2007
    Leesville, SC
    Little things that sometimes annoy me...

    1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time.... I know where my watch is, where the heck is yours? Do I point at my privates when asking where the toilet is?

    2. People who'd rather waste time searching the entire room for the T.V. remote - because they won't walk to the T.V. and just change the channel manually.

    3. When people say, "Oh, you just want to have your cake and eat it too".
    Darn right! What good is cake - if you can't eat it?

    4. When people say "It's always the last place you look".
    Of course it is. Why the Dickens would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people actually DO this? Who and where are they? I'm gonna kick their butts!

    5. When people say while watching a film "Did you see that?".
    No, dimwit, I paid $12 to come to the cinema and stare at the floor.

    6. People who ask "Can I ask you a question?".... What kinda choice is that, there sunshine?

    7. When something is 'New and Improved!' So, which is it?
    If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. So how can it be "improved."
    If it's an improvement, then something must have come before it, so it can't be new.

    8. When people say "Life is short..."
    What the heck is that supposed to mean?? I mean, life is the longest danged thing anyone ever does!! What can you do that's longer?

    9. When you are waiting for the bus, and someone asks "Has the bus come yet?" Duh! If the bus came... would I be standing here?

    This struck me in a weird sort of curmudgeonly humorous way. Sometimes you just wanna let it all out you know? [​IMG]
    Last edited: Aug 6, 2009
  2. blueoval1

    blueoval1 Songster

    Oct 21, 2008
    Raleigh N.C.
    Thats hilarious I laughed at every single one. The one about it was in the last place I looked gets me too.
  3. mamagardener

    mamagardener Songster

    Good list. What annoys me is when people say "no offense, but..." because you know they are going to say something that offends you.
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    This is great!!!
    I love numbers 2,4,5,6,8, & 9
  6. Goldlaced_Girl

    Goldlaced_Girl Songster

    Feb 25, 2009
    New Hampshire
    LOL all so true!!
  7. Davaroo

    Davaroo Poultry Crank

    Feb 4, 2007
    Leesville, SC
    Quote:Exactly. Or how about, "Don't take this the wrong way, but..." Like your gonna have a choice, you know?

    Another that gets in my gizzard is when they say, "Hey, I'm only being honest..." Somehow, that gives them the right to be an ass?

    "Arrows of truth should be tipped with honey." - - Arab proverb
    Last edited: Aug 9, 2009
  8. joebryant

    joebryant Crowing

    Davaroo, may I ask you a question about the watch on your wrist there? The reason I ask is that I’ve lost the remote and don’t know if my program has started yet. Will you help me look for it?
    No? Well, okay, guess I can’t have my cake and eat it too. Do you like the movie we’re watching. Hope you didn’t miss that long scene where they were, you know.
    Can I ask you a question? Is your watch one of the new and improved ones that set themselves by the atomic clock? I don’t want one like that because life is too short to insist on knowing the time right to the exact second. Oh, dang, gotta go catch my bus. Has it come yet?
  9. ranchhand

    ranchhand Rest in Peace 1956-2011

    Aug 25, 2008
  10. Quote:Poor Joe, Davaroo will officially no longer speak to you.

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