I got a friend who is 21 years old, living with her parents, and she usually post herself on FB about this guy she met online. I dont know much about this guy but I do not know what to make of the whole thing. So I am going to try to explain it all on here and what I think of the whole matter. She met him online about almost two years ago, he lives in Boston while she lives here in IL. Neither one of them ever met each other personally. They do call each other now and then. He is starting out on his new job. His history is questionable, as he was once a BAD boy, getting into fist fights, pirating CDs (don't know if he served time for it) and trying to improve his life for her. She said he is so terribly shy, heavyweight but a real teddy bear! (I have confirmed that with some of his FB friends that knows him well, it is true on that case). If my memory serves me right, he has alot of tattoos and she does not like men with tattoos but she has seen his pictures and she told me that she will not give out his pictures to anyone because he is such a private person and people would think less of him. Tattoo or not, I dont care if he is tattoed up and down and lots of pierces, what it matters is her happiness. I think he is four to six years older than her. He had odd jobs off and on since HS. He does not know what he wants to do in life yet but trying to find work so he can support his "future" family or get himself established. He is extremely busy and he is not "into" FB or all the social stuff going on computers and pretty much a "home body". (thats ok, some of us dont care for the FB or social networking but he does try to keep up to date on his friends and see how they are all doing). Neither one of them can see each other personally, face to face in the flesh, going out to eat. They did broke up this summer, she pined for him to come back and sort things out and then he came back again. He has told her he is trying to better his life, finding a job before making a serious commitment. She wanted to get married and have kids and all that security stuff which I can understand that. If he is not online, she gets upset. If she does not hear from him for more than a day, she gets upset and rants on FB. If she didn't hear from him for a week, oh boy, the rants gets upsetting that she would be in a "major" depression, ticked off and ready to give up. And the next it would be "YAY, my man is on!" We have taken her to events and parties, she didn't dance or socialize with any other men that express interest in her. I know she has a very low self esteem and on meds (for depression and ADD) and she has turned all of them down, being a wall flower and complains no one wants to dance with her or she is not pretty enough, blah blah blah. what!!!!!!!! Even my husband asked her for a dance and she turned him down too! She now says that she is "saving" herself for him and wishes he was there to dance with her and be with her. she calls the online socialization as "dating" but NO physical contact or doing things together has been made. So she still says she is dating him. On FB, she expressed "He is the one for me, I miss him so bad, I wish he was here to hug and hold me, I can not live my life without him" and all that stuff. Today this one takes the cake, she now calls him her "loving unofficial husband" and "I think my relationship status is wrong, I am not in a relationship, he now calls me his Wifey, and I guess we are more than going out and we are not officially married. But I am his unofficial wifey!" OMG!!!!!!!!!!!! I got a thing about online thing and I can not get my head wrapped around it when two people met online and never met each other. If the guy is so private and does not show himself or wrote anything on FB, it makes me question about this guy even he is a real teddy bear. I know she is old enough to make her own decisions but she is still living with parents which they do NOT like the way she is doing to herself online. I think some folks are a "different person" when they talk to a stranger and they can get into a make believe, fantasy world to "catch" a mate. Even our counselors had expressed it is so common and once they meet, it is very different or they get lucky! Most of the time, its different. My husband, almost all of her friends and I kept telling her to find someone else rather than putting her life on hold just for this Boston guy. He may be the sweetest guy but does she really knows him well? She does not want to be alone, traveling and wants a companion when he comes to visit (when he EVER comes) or she goes to him (if she can get her meds under control because she almost get into car accidents of blackouts and severe depressions). I do not mind them being good online friends at all but when it comes to the seriousness of matters of the heart, we all dont see it being "fruitful" or success at all in the future of their relationship, let alone of the talk of marriage already. So there you are, all in a nutshell..........is she #%$*! crazy???????????????? I know I should not be getting involved but if it is publicized in FB, MySpace, etc. Most of us, just don't see this relationship going anywhere. He will stay in Boston while she will remain in Illinois. She works "as needed" babysitter for a family in the same town for almost three years and she is going to college but unsure of what she want to go. I really wanted to tell her to get her life together and quit looking so hard. She did mentioned that she has a hard time finding guys around here and she had look online for a guy who wants to marry her and have kids and live on the farm. She wanted a serious committed relationship. So if she was your friend, what would you say and what would you do?