stressed

[QuinnP]

Hello, me again....I'm getting back into chicklets, been lurking for a while, I will be getting a crippled roo soon (wont be living in my apartment, but with a nearby friend) anyway, my husband is bi-polar. He only gets manic once in a while & then everything hits the fan. He gets a God-complex, talks complete blather that makes no sense, spend hours scribbling weird stuff on paper, is in my face constantly---AAAAAAAGH!!!! It was so bad last night that I had to escape him for about half an hour. I am ashamed of that, I love him so much. When he gets this way he rambles about death & he says he hates me, threatens to leave, yells, ect..... he doesn't know he's yelling tho, but if I tell him to please keep it down he gets really defensive & then shouts louder. It lasts usually for 10 days. We had a pal staying with us for 8 days & Nate talked, whispered, blabbered the entire time. His voice is almost gone, & I'm about to scream. He takes every little thing as a personal insult during these times, stomps off mad & leaves me confused. He usually doesn't need medicine & wont take it anyway. The only thing that helps him is mildly illegal. I know he doesn't mean it when he says he hates me, but its distressing.

----talks about hell, how he's god & how he is only allowing the world to keep being so cruel. says he alone can save the universe, ect//////

makes me want to slap him. last night I had to run off to the nearest pub.

 

[Dar]

mental illnesses are nothing to minimize he needs help to manage the constant ups and downs can become worse and can lead to other behaviors

never take a personal threat and pass it off. please for your own safety... he may be 100% harmless but when he is at his lows.. he is not in control the illness is.

maybe its time for a re-evaluation. The whole "god" thing with the scribbles kinda sends up red flags. Please make sure you are safe.

Remember he is the one with an illness but you need help too.. in the line of supports and caregiver relief.

 

[StrawberryHouseMouse]

He needs mental care.

 

[phaethona]

its not uncommon for people to self-medicate, my husband does on a regular basis. we've tried to get him help but he refuses. he feels that by self-medicating and refusing proper medication, he retains some degree of control(anger and control are his main issues). but the reality of self-medicating(and I think we may be talking about the same method) they are essentially damaging functional parts of the brain, even though it appears harmless, it is not.
sounds like he is in dire need of help, and I hope he gets that somehow. we're about to divorce over it and I hope your situation doesn't get to that point.
find some resources in your area, therapy(even if he won't go they can help you deal with it). have a back-up system of professionals, friends, and family who are on your side.

 

[chickensducks&agoose]

Not to rock your boat, but his behavior sounds a LOT like one of my good friends from school who is schizophrenic.. The bipolar people I know tend to be really depressed, almost lethargic, or really upbeat and things are awesome and sort of crazy hyper... God complexes and crazy screaming and scribbling, and that kind of 'crazy' sounds schizophrenic. and they have some good meds for that. Good luck, hang in there! But do be sure that YOU are safe if he's off his rocker for a while.


and as far as toking your medicine, i mean TAKING, (oops

) depressants aren't the answer, and honestly, whenever I used to toke my medicine, it just made me feel crazier... so probably not a great thing in this situation.


here's a link connecting the two...

http://www.reuters.com/article/idUSTRE65150620100602

 

[redhen]

chickensducks&agoose :

Not to rock your boat, but his behavior sounds a LOT like one of my good friends from school who is schizophrenic.. The bipolar people I know tend to be really depressed, almost lethargic, or really upbeat and things are awesome and sort of crazy hyper... God complexes and crazy screaming and scribbling, and that kind of 'crazy' sounds schizophrenic. and they have some good meds for that. Good luck, hang in there! But do be sure that YOU are safe if he's off his rocker for a while.


and as far as toking your medicine, i mean TAKING, (oops

) depressants aren't the answer, and honestly, whenever I used to toke my medicine, it just made me feel crazier... so probably not a great thing in this situation.


here's a link connecting the two...

http://www.reuters.com/article/idUSTRE65150620100602

Thats just what i was thinking..Schizophrenic... He needs to get in to be evaluated ASAP..
QUINN: YOU need to tell the doc what you just told us here... all those symptoms
Best of luck!​

 

[QuinnP]

he wont take meds. wont go to a doctor, hates shrinks except the one he plays guitar with. I've tried to get him to go to the VA but he wont. (I lke the 'toking his meds lol) I've got a fever today, sore throat, general uuuuuuuuugh...........feeling. He denies he has a problem, I actually knocked me head against the wall to keep from screaming last night. I'm starting to look like a raccoon (bags under the eyes! YIKES!) I've been staying out of the house for as long asd possible & oh, how'd youse know I was talking about pot?!

I love this forum. the voice coming from him is not his! Thats not my Nate! Should I tell God to get lost & never come back? he'd really take offense to that.

 

[QuinnP]

I'v e told him I am with him til the end & will love him forever & ever. He cried because his friend told him to chill out, calm down & then left without saying goodbye. My sweet Nathan. He's tender hearted even in a mania

 

[TwistedSerpent]

Remember, in the end your only responsibility is towards yourself and your children, not him. Do what you need to to keep yourself and your kids safe, there is absolutely no reason to put yourself and them through this hell. If is isnt going to be fixed then remove yourself, you know full well its just going to get worse.

Whats it going to take to make you come to your senses? Its to a point where your physically harming yourself, is that not a sign that something needs to change immediatly? You're a wreck, I can tell even through here, take care of yourself before you end up just as bad as him, or at the very least get the kids somewhere safe and stable so they dont have to see him going crazy and you banging your head through walls because you cant take it anymore yet while defending and protecting him.

There is no reason to stay with someone if they're not willing to stay with you, and that includes mentally.

 

[QuinnP]

I have no children living with me, & a very very high pain tolerance. my 11 year old girl is in Colorado, & Susannah is in the clouds.