These are the days of our lives... Okay, so The Plan was for Kevin, Sis SO, to do up some chickens and a ham and bring it all to my house... I'd do the sides... Mom's bringing this and that... everyone converge at our house yes? Round about lunchtime so we could still head to DH's house at 5pm and not explode. Seemed like a good plan... Sis and Kevin were in, We were in, Mom and Uncle were in... hadn't talked to Bro. Evidently Bro told Sis that he wasn't coming because Kevin was going to be there. Sis is furious with him and says that if Kevin isn't welcome then her (and the kids, placed with CPS who really NEED family right now) aren't coming either. Now when Kevin first 'joined the family' so to speak Bro was totally okay with him... friendly and all... it was only after Sis told us that Kevin had done this that and the other (won't elaborate, family site) that Bro's opinion of Kevin changed... now he can't stand the guy. Told Sis that and she just kinda went "Uhhhh"... She doesn't seem to understand that her family would no like someone who's hurt her in the ways she's told us that Kevin has. Somehow is offended by that. And goes quiet when we remind her that it's only HER word that made us form this new opinion of him. Problem is we can't really know, since we weren't there, whether these things Sis told us are true and Kevin really is a *insert negative name* OR if she was just lying through her teeth in order to manipulate us. Kevin has a rap sheet (according to Mom's checking it out) so not 100% trustworthy IMO... but Sis has a LONG record of manipulation, drug abuse, etc all on her own too so not 100%. Upon hearing about Bro's stand, Kevin said he'll cook up the meats and just stay home, no problem... you need to be with your family, kids need to be with family... etc. But Sis is saying that Kevin IS her family and if we don't like him then tough nuggets on seeing her/the kids. Sounds to ME that Kevin is being a pretty logical fella, family first kind of attitude. While Sis is being really cranky... she's decided that the reason Bro dislikes him is "because he's black" her words, not mine. And she says it makes no sense since he was black back when Bro first met him and was nice... and so I AGAIN remind her that Bro's opinion changed when SHE told him/us about Kevin hurting her... and again with the "Uhhhh..." and circle back around the the "it's because he's black" crap. I do believe the guy has done some really stupid things in the past... no doubt... but the way she's acting... I just don't know if I believe he's hurt her or not. If he has, then it's really typical for her to be covering for him. But if he hasn't and she lied to all of us is she going to admit it? No. So how the devil do we sort this crap out!??!?! I'm at a loss... any advice appreciated.