Today is a very, very bad day. My SO was killed in an auto accident the 15th. Someone, who has obviously never been through this, told me that the packing up of his clothes would be the worst part. It isn't. Not even close. It is waking up in the morning and he's not here. It is learning something on the internet or hearing something on the radio that he might be interested in and he's not here to tell it to. It is the prospect of winter storms and bad weather, and knowing he won't be here with me to share it and to ease my nervousness. It is seeing the jigsaw puzzles we were going to do together this winter and knowing I will be doing them alone. It is unexpectedly coming across some little item he had bought for me just because he thought I would like it. It is watching his dog endlessly search and watch for him. It is knowing he is never, ever, going to walk through that door again.