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To All Pet Lovers

Discussion in 'Random Ramblings' started by nccountrygirl, Jan 19, 2008.

  1. nccountrygirl

    nccountrygirl Chillin' With My Peeps

    Jul 31, 2007
    Sanford N.C.
    To be posted VERY LOW on the refrigerator door - snout height.

    Dear Dogs and Cats, The dishes with the paw prints are yours and contain your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food.
    Please note, placing a paw print in the middle of my plate of food does not stake a claim for it becoming your food and dish, nor do I find that
    aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.

    The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack. Beating me to the bottom is not the object. Tripping me doesn't help because I fall faster than you can run.

    I cannot buy anything bigger than a king-sized bed. I am very sorry about this. Do not think I will continue sleeping on the couch to ensure your comfort. Dogs and cats can actually curl up in a ball when they sleep. It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other stretched out to the fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out the other end to maximize space is nothing but sarcasm.

    For the last time, there is not a secret exit from the bathroom. If by some miracle I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not
    necessary to claw, whine, meow, try to turn the knob or get your paw under the edge and try to pull the door open. I must exit through the same door I entered. Also, I have been using the bathroom for years --canine or feline attendance is not mandatory

    The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough!

    To pacify you, my dear pets, I have posted the following message on our front door:

    To All Non-Pet Owners Who Visit & Like to Complain About Our Pets

    1. They live here. You don't.
    2. If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture. (That's why they call it "fur"niture.)
    3. I like my pets a lot better than I like most people.
    4. To you, it's an animal. To me, he/she is an adopted son /daughter who is short, hairy, walks on all fours and doesn't speak clearly.

    Remember: Dogs and cats are better than kids because they:

    1. Eat less
    2. Don't ask for money all the time
    3. Are easier to train
    4. Usually come when called
    5. Never drive your car
    6. Don't hang out with drug-using friends
    7. Don't smoke or drink
    8. Don't worry about having to buy the latest fashions
    9. Don't wear your clothes
    10. Don't need a gazillion dollars for college, and
    11. If they get pregnant, you can sell their children.
     
    Last edited: Jan 19, 2008
  2. cockadoodlemom

    cockadoodlemom Chillin' With My Peeps

    Feb 25, 2007
    Texas
    [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG]
     
  3. Carole AM

    Carole AM Chillin' With My Peeps

    1,709
    10
    218
    Jan 12, 2007
    Goshen, Indiana
    Love it!
     
  4. blb

    blb Chillin' With My Peeps

    109
    1
    131
    Jan 13, 2008
    Maryland
    So cute, and true!! [​IMG]
     
  5. dakinsmimi

    dakinsmimi Chillin' With My Peeps

    110
    0
    119
    Jun 16, 2007
    Mississippi
    Toooo Funny!!! Where do you get this stuff? Always makes my day and starts it off with a laugh.
     
  6. Farmer Kitty

    Farmer Kitty Flock Mistress

    Sep 18, 2007
    Wisconsin
    [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG]
     
  7. Southern28Chick

    Southern28Chick Flew The Coop

    Apr 16, 2007
    To All Non-Pet Owners Who Visit & Like to Complain About Our Pets

    1. They live here. You don't.
    2. If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture. (That's why they call it "fur"niture.)
    3. I like my pets a lot better than I like most people.
    4. To you, it's an animal. To me, he/she is an adopted son /daughter who is short, hairy, walks on all fours and doesn't speak clearly.

    [​IMG]
     
  8. Crazy4Chicks

    Crazy4Chicks Chillin' With My Peeps

    Nov 20, 2007
    Glendale, AZ
    I am right there with the whole bed thing - but I only have a queensized bed with 5 dogs !!!!

    I love it- thank you I will make a copy to hang in the house !!

    Julie
     
  9. fallenweeble

    fallenweeble Chillin' With My Peeps

    865
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    Dec 4, 2007
    AWESOME!
    [​IMG]
     
  10. SpottedCrow

    SpottedCrow Flock Goddess

    LOL!
    How true is that?!
     

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