untitled a story about a girl

Discussion in 'Games, Jokes, and Fun!' started by ChickenRadio, Apr 11, 2012.

  1. ChickenRadio

    ChickenRadio Chillin' With My Peeps

    Please do not copy this book

    Chapters
    1 freedom
    2 wolf people
    3 powers
    4 the dragon


    There will be more chapters.




    Pictures: still not working
     
    Last edited: May 10, 2012
  2. ChickenRadio

    ChickenRadio Chillin' With My Peeps

    Chapter 1
    The cart rattled down the isle it stopped in front of Kayly's crate the man pushing it opened Kayly's crate door he grabbed her and put her on the cart. Then kept going down the isle he went in a door that closed behind him. Kayly, screamed and into where the Everlasting ice forest stood. It was home to the mean ice dragons who would eat you no one who went in the Everlasting ice forest came out alive. The man shoved Kayly, outside the doors and locked them Kayly heard the ice dragon's coming she ran and ran but a dragon came in front of her. She stared it in the eyes the dragon looked puzzled for a second then layed down. Kayly, got on it it took her to the side of the forest she thanked the dragon then ran off. The dragons outraged they had been tricked hissed and screeched at her but Kayly kept running. She ran and ran until she was at the side of the road. There she collasped on the ground breathing heavily she watched as car's drove past her. Then she blacked out.
     
    Last edited: Apr 11, 2012
  3. StormyNorm

    StormyNorm Chillin' With My Peeps

    113
    0
    81
    Apr 2, 2012
    Awesome book! More!
     
  4. ChickenRadio

    ChickenRadio Chillin' With My Peeps

    Thanks storm
     
  5. ChickenRadio

    ChickenRadio Chillin' With My Peeps

    Chapter 2


    Kayly wok up in a bed in a white room with white sheets. She freaked out for a second then she saw a girl at the end of the bed she was in. The girl had waist long red hair and green eyes Kayly realized the girl was holding a tray with food on it. The girl handed her a glass of water. Kayly gluppe it down. "W-where am i." Kayly stammered the girl smiled "You're at my house. my mom and i found you on the side of the road." The girl said "And by the way i'm Shayly," "I'm Kayly," Kayly said "Nice to meet you." Shayly, handed Kayly, the tray "thanks." said Kayly she started to eat.
     
    1 person likes this.
  6. chickenlover237

    chickenlover237 Chillin' With My Peeps

    i like it! more!
     
  7. ChickenRadio

    ChickenRadio Chillin' With My Peeps

    Chapter 3

    A few weeks later Kayly was doing good. Now she and Shayly were playing in the forest. Suddenly Shayly stopped. "Whats wrong?" Kayly asked.
    "I think i heard something." Shayly replied. Kayly shrugged and the two girls began to play again. A bush rustled nearby. "Whats that?" Shayly asked. "Dang! i should have known they would've come." Shayly said. "Who?" Kayly asked. "The wolf people they live in this forest." Shayly replied. A dark shape came out of a bush then tons more shapes. The shapes looked human but they had tails like a wolf's and ears like a wolf's and some had wings. "Don't move." Shayly whispered.
     
  8. StormyNorm

    StormyNorm Chillin' With My Peeps

    113
    0
    81
    Apr 2, 2012
    Nice.....

    [​IMG]
     
  9. chickenlover237

    chickenlover237 Chillin' With My Peeps

    you changed it but this one is still cool, though it would be better if the chapters were longer and they had more detail like what the charecter was feeling what the suroundings looked like to the charecter and things like that
     
  10. Totalcolour

    Totalcolour Chillin' With My Peeps

    Very imaginative. I do think the grammar and spelling could be cleaned up a bit though. Perhaps it's something you should to think about - spell checking before posting. It would then come across as more professional.

    Good start.
    (I agree: the chapters should be much longer; right now those are only paragraph length.)
     

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