Update On Brother

Discussion in 'Family Life - Stories, Pictures & Updates' started by Morgan7782, Jun 25, 2010.

  1. Morgan7782

    Morgan7782 Dense Egg Goo

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    Mar 22, 2010
    Sacramento CA
    Alright so a while ago I posted about my brother who shot himself in the chest, and wanted to post an update. My brother is alive, but the bullet tore his left lung up and now he can't walk fast or run or exert himself in ANY way. His two kids have been staying with me every weekend while he signs himself up for rehab and attempts to get help. I feel some resentment toward him, especially seeing my young neice and nephew go through such a horrible ordeal.. I love my neice and nephew, and they are so sweet and do not deserve what happened to them. Anyway, sorry, I just wanted to post some pictures of my temp. kiddo's. Reema is my neice, she is wonderful and a spitting image of myself in a lot of ways. From the time she was born until she was about 6 I helped raise her. My brother was heavily into drugs and was not around, and the mother was working full time. So I brought Reema to my school with me, and just dealt. I am very bonded with her, she is turning into a beautiful girl and I am so proud she has come through this. My nephew, Ronin, is great as well, but he is his father in every way. Everything is guns, shooting and killing people and things in his games, and violence. I love him though and merely try to steer his attention other ways. I wanted to post some pictures of them, and please everybody keep THEM in your thoughts. I am doing alright myself, but the kids are the ones I worry about not myself at all.

    Reema:

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    (This was taken after I got my first chickens. Reema was playing a "rooster" and she was on the roof crowing LOL)
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    Ronin:

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    I love these kids more then most things in the world, and I wish my brother would realize how lucky he is to have them both. These kids just suffered through a UGLY seperation between their mom and dad, and now they are dealing with their father's... Issues. I am trying to make everything as stable as I can, but I am a 24 year old woman who is basically raising these two kids until their Dad get's his act together. Anyway, I wanted to share how great these kids are. Thanks
     
  2. NurseELB

    NurseELB Chillin' With My Peeps

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    Oct 16, 2008
    Lacey, WA
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    You are ALL in my prayers. Reema is BEAUTIFUL!, Ronin is going to be a handsome man when he grows up.

    I hope you are able to get the kids to counseling. I'm sure there are several other issues that led up to this fiasco, and they need someone to talk to so they can begin their own healing.

    [​IMG]
     
  3. turney31

    turney31 Chillin' With My Peeps

    Sep 14, 2008
    palestine texas
    They are so lucky to have you. You will never regret taking them and they will never forget what you have done. Love alone makes a family. Hugs and prayers!

    Micah
     
  4. chicken_china_mom

    chicken_china_mom Crazy for Cochins

    Apr 24, 2009
    Tab, Indiana
    Your niece and nephew, and your entire family are in my thoughts and prayers. I can't even imagine how hard this ordeal has been for the kids. All you can do is continue to be there for them, to show them the love and stability that they need so desperately, and I truly hope that your brother received the wake up call necessary to get his act straight and get his life in order. I find the act of suicide, or attempted suicide, to be an extremely selfish act, and I'm sorry that your brother didn't think about his family when he shot himself. I truly do hope he can get the help he needs. Enjoy your niece and nephew. [​IMG]
     
  5. Morgan7782

    Morgan7782 Dense Egg Goo

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    Mar 22, 2010
    Sacramento CA
    Thank you all for your kind words, they mean the world to me. I don't have many close friends, and BYC is a close knit community forum that I thoroughly enjoy. I love my neice and nephew more then air itself, and it pains me to see them go through something so hard. I feel such anger.. And yes even hatred (emotion not actual. I do love my brother) toward my brother at this time. This is NOT an isolated incident, but it is the worst by far. I love my mom, but my brother has horrid genes.. His father commited suicide while in prison, and my mother was a very hardcore junkie (she is sober and a wonderful woman now though!!) so he has a tough set up for himself. Addiction runs rampid in my family, and it scares us all that Ronin will follow in his father's footsteps just how my brother followed in HIS fathers. Especially with how into violence he is.

    When they come here it is a vacation. They can run with my dog, go to parks, play with the chickens, and just overall let go. If I were in a stable place myself I would open my home completely to them, but their mother has been through so much with their father that she resents our family now. But my home is always open to these kids, always. I tell Reema all the time, if she shows up at 3am, she knows where the key is. Ronin loves my chickens, and is so proud because he can put them to bed by himself (they follow him!). I try to steer his attention away from the constant violence in his imaginary games, but I am not sure what is and is not appropriate for a 5 year old. His mother lets him do WHATEVER whenever.. Hard to compete with heh.

    Reema is a wonderful young girl, right after my own heart. She is deeply passionate about dog rescue, and pit bulls specifically. (which is my area [​IMG] rescued pitties) She even wrote an entire book on dog fighting and BSL and such. She loves animals, horses and dogs mostly, and has been involved with both since birth just about. She says she wants to rescue pit bulls when she gets older.. ::proud tear:: She is intelligent, well spoken, and very outgoing. All I want is her and Ronin's happiness. If they are happy, I am happy.

    My brother should be glad he is going to rehab so I don't wring his neck like an unwanted cockerel... [​IMG] [​IMG] Of course I never speak of this in front of the kids, ever. But.. Man.. I am so angry with him for doing this. I agree that suicide, attempted or otherwise, is such a selfish thing to do. A permanant solution to a temporary problem. I hope to gosh he will find the help he needs, because I cannot think of a lower rock bottom other then death itself. To me that's the easy way out.

    The only thing I can do to keep myself sane is care for these kiddos. I would love to offer to pay for counseling (unemployed but I WOULD find a way..) but their mother is not interested and because I have no custody I have no rights to do something like bring them to counseling. God knows they need it.. This drug/alcohol mess has been going on since Reema was born. Far too long. Anyway, I am sorry for writing so much, and thank you all for listening and being so supportive. It does me a ton to me.
     
  6. PineappleMama

    PineappleMama Chillin' With My Peeps

    I feel your pain. I've got a sister that hasn't made the most brilliant choices, and it's her THREE children who suffer for it. As we speak my niece is here for a 'spend the night' that's actually been three nights... I feel MUCH better with her here than at the motel they're staying at. That place gives me the CREEPS... bad and my radar is good, so there's a reason. Any woman who is outside, walks, anything is pulled over and interrogated about possible prostitution by the cops... I'm guessing because that does happen there alot... which scares the crap out of me. Hence me not having a problem with niece being here... she's DD's best friend anyways. Her oldest younger brother lives with his dad, so ... less worries there. The baby is six months old, and he never leaves mom's side so not as much worry. But niece is a beautiful little girl and it just scares me to think she might be a victim there. I make it out that she's doing US a favor by letting niece come over... if she had a clue what I was thinking she'd yank her back just for pride. God forbid she get a job, get a place, get a LIFE that doesn't revolve around drugs... her latest idea is AirCheck... based on her income ($140/wk child support) she qualifies for $3k for her car (bad tranny and parked in my drive) so she's going to use that and claim she's working for a friend of hers to get a loan... can you say fraud much? Keep in mind she's got charges for check fraud to the tune of $1200 hanging over her head too.

    Wow, didn't mean to rant there... point is, I understand where you're at... feeling useless to stop the problem, only wanting to help the innocent victims of bad parent's choices... it's a crappy road, but some of us have to (based on our own morals) walk it.

    [​IMG] x12
     
  7. Mattemma

    Mattemma Overrun With Chickens

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    Aug 12, 2009
    Prayers for the kiddos who have to go through so much due to their parents. Bless those who give them a sense of normal life. I have my former co-workers boys with me every summer,because their only other option is a summer in a ghetto-like setting with drugs and violence.Better they spend time at their *summer home* with us. It sure feels good helping kids out,but oh so hard to take them back home.

    There will come a time when the kids could legally choose where they want to live.Keep that as an option. Hoping your brother learns from this experience.I don't think my brother ever will learn from HIS mistakes,but atleast he is on his own and not affecting anyone other than me and my mom.If he had kids I would offer to raise them just so they could avoid his drama.
     

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