Here lately, I have come to terms that life stinks. idk if I can use the word I want so stinks will do. I really hope things get better but at this point I can't see that silver lining even with binoculars. First off momma became ill with a backache 4 months ago. She thought it was because she spent so much time at the PC that her back muscles were strained. She also thought about her bones because she broke it in the 1970's. She went to the doctor and they started treating for both options. The pain got horrible and 2 weeks later they do the scans, tests...you name it. They finally found her problem. Pancreatic Cancer. Momma passed away October 21st. I'm glad mom didn't suffer very much as Pancreatic Cancer is horribly painful. Her doctors kept her well medicated while they TRIED to help her with treatment and Chemo. They had hoped to reduce it enough for tumor removal. Mom couldn't withstand Chemo and slipped into a coma on the 19th. She was a YOUNG 72. My dad is 88 with Dementia and PTSD. I am his guardian now. Let me tell you, he is an ornery old coot. I have to cook and place the meals straight in front of him or he will only eat toast, cake and coffee. Thats it! The repeating he does really gets to me some days. It's like a record that gets stuck on the same groove. I love daddy and I am gentle with him even when he's in one of his ill moods. Which I can tell you can get hairy! I guess I would be too. I come back home and let him cool off. Actually, he is never mad at anyone here. Well, maybe one thing. I won't fix his van. He can't see well and he's almost completely deaf. He has a DL but is not allowed to drive. He takes off in it without telling anyone where he's going. I'm afraid with the Dementia he won't remember where he lives or how to get home. With his hearing and sight he may hurt/kill himself or someone else. I am trying to lesson the burden on me here by re-homing flocks of birds. So far it's not dwindled much. My son is another problem. He lives in an apartment and dropped his birds off here 3 years ago! About 170 birds! He has his stuff stored in dads house all this time and dad wants his space back. Which is his family room. We haven't been able to shoot pool for 3 years. We used to have dinners over at their house and play a few games of pool after eating. Then he's got our other truck so we have 1 vehicle now. Then instead of getting his life together and getting his OWN house so he can take his stuff and birds. He informs me his GF maybe PREGNANT again. He is almost 27 and a good job. But he needs to SAVE money to get that house he NEEDS. My grandson isn't a year old yet. Now, I am trying to convince Lissie we HAVE to thin the flocks. There's almost or over 500 birds here. I'm not even going to get into the bills my hubby racks up. Thankx for letting me vent.