UPDATE page 2: Can you all help me?

Discussion in 'Family Life - Stories, Pictures & Updates' started by Momagain1, Jun 24, 2011.

  1. Momagain1

    Momagain1 Chillin' With My Peeps

    Feb 13, 2011
    Central IL
    I have a very very dear friend who is dying. It is crushing me and I cant even imagine what it is doing to her family (hubby, girl 8 and boy 12)..

    she told me tonight she is going to know it is ONLY the hand of God keeping her alive if she is here in 6 months..that her body is telling
    her it is close...

    I feel sick..this woman and I are so dang close..the only person I've ever been this close to besides my husband & his mom...

    She has a hard time getting around right now so she is stuck at home most of the time...

    what I want is:

    list of simple, cheap ideas to do for her...(she's not a flowery girl..she's a more kick your butt ornery type)...
    we dont have delivery or take out really around here...I do plan on making a large meal each week from now on to her fam..to takea bit of burden off her & hubby...

    BUT what I want more..and I know will reach out to her heart..is a mothers journal ...something like this; BUT I wanted one from a mom to her son and a mom to her daughter and a wife to her husband..
    anyone??? I KNOW she will do this as she's not able to get out and is sick of reading..she would ADORE to do something liek this for her family!!!

    http://www.amazon.com/Mothers-Legacy-Your-Story-Words/dp/1404113339/ref=cm_cr_pr_product_top

    she doesnt have a bucket list as she says the things she wants to do, can only be done w/Gods healing hands..such as walk w/the family, take a hike, ride a bike etc..
    (Not only is she dying of a lung disease..but 2 yrs ago this upcoming december, she had a tumor on her leg bone..she received a cadaver bone, but it is just now taking like it should
    and she has been pretty much in a wheelchair for all this time..) her lungs are working at 19%...which is very close to passing %'s...

    Please help me..help her..I'm a mess..and I just want to help her..
     
    Last edited: Jun 25, 2011
  2. JulieNKC

    JulieNKC Overrun With Chickens

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    Kansas City
    [​IMG] Sorry about what you are going through. I'm afraid I can't be very much help, but I am praying for you and her family.
     
  3. b.hromada

    b.hromada Flock Mistress

    I'm so very sorry about your dear friend. [​IMG] I don't really know what to say, only, just be there for her. If she needs to talk or what ever she may want to do at the time. I wish I had some more ideas, but this is what comes to mind for me most. [​IMG] and prayers to all involved.
     
  4. Hot2Pot

    Hot2Pot Fox Hollow Rabbitry

    Feb 1, 2010
    West TN
    Mostly I would suggest spending time with her. When people are dying, other people may abandon them and not want to be nearby. It helps to just have a friend there. Maybe sit and read together or make a simple quilt to remember her by. So sorry this is happening.
     
  5. Momagain1

    Momagain1 Chillin' With My Peeps

    Feb 13, 2011
    Central IL
    true but I dont want to intrude either..its a hard line to walk...

    hubby cant take any time off of work; he's used all his sick leave, his FMLA time, his vacation time to take her back/forth to the doc/hospital etc..savings are all gone..
    so he has to work to pay her med. bills and then when he gets home..even if they are fighting..its THEIR time...he's soo stressed etc..and I just dont want to add to it..
    and this summer the kids are home..so I dont want to take time away from the kids/her...

    such a tightrope!
     
  6. redhen

    redhen Kiss My Grits... Premium Member

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    May 19, 2008
    Western MA
    OH wow, thats so sad. [​IMG]
    I would spend time with her EVERY chance you can...
    Get a pen and paper and ask her what shed like to say to her family.. (how she feels that day.... what she wants them to know about her and her history to pass down to her grandchildren someday.. )... get or make some nice journals to write it all down in for her...
    Maybe even a video tape for EACH of them of her, with a special message from her.... something special they can always have from her, and look back on to remember her...
    Thats what i would do if i was passing and i knew it...
     
  7. redhen

    redhen Kiss My Grits... Premium Member

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    Western MA
    Quote:Arent you a stay at home mom?? Or work from home mom?
    Go to see her when her hubby is at work... I'm sure you can fix your schedule around that???
     
  8. Momagain1

    Momagain1 Chillin' With My Peeps

    Feb 13, 2011
    Central IL
    Quote:Arent you a stay at home mom?? Or work from home mom?
    Go to see her when her hubby is at work... I'm sure you can fix your schedule around that???

    Yes...I do..I also homeschool during the summer and run a biz FT from home..
    I can work around that..I just have this feeling of me taking time away from her and her kids...
    But..I'm sure that the kids may like the distraction??

    I think I'm heading to bed..crying has given me a silly headache..I'll think better in the a/m...
     
  9. redhen

    redhen Kiss My Grits... Premium Member

    35,112
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    May 19, 2008
    Western MA
    Quote:Arent you a stay at home mom?? Or work from home mom?
    Go to see her when her hubby is at work... I'm sure you can fix your schedule around that???

    Yes...I do..I also homeschool during the summer and run a biz FT from home..
    I can work around that..I just have this feeling of me taking time away from her and her kids...
    But..I'm sure that the kids may like the distraction??

    I think I'm heading to bed..crying has given me a silly headache..I'll think better in the a/m...

    I would just ask your friend what she really wants.... [​IMG]
     
    Last edited: Jun 24, 2011
  10. Momagain1

    Momagain1 Chillin' With My Peeps

    Feb 13, 2011
    Central IL
    thanks..didnt make it to bed yet lol..

    she doesnt want to be a bother to anyone..thats all she has said..ugh..

    I'll keep talking and listening...for now :)
     

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