I've had a Christmas diner for my DF's side of the family for the last 2 years. This will be the 3rd. My Sister, a long story short, has moved her kids around to 3 different homes in the last year, 3 different schools and I really dont know if they go to school. I am very disappointed in her. She has lost her home because she is lazy, she doesnt work, and now she is seeing a person of a different race. I dont have anything against that its just the way they act. They were at my home a couple of months ago and they both had filthy mouths. She wanted to know if she could stay at my home overnight and I told her no, been there done that and I wont do it again. She and the 3 kids had stayed with us before for 2 weeks last winter. I worked came home there were dishes in the sink, cloths on the floor and she drank coffee pot after pot. She never lifted a finger to do work even after I ask. Her one son urinated in a plastic container right next to the toilet and never cleaned it. I lost it that day. BTY hes 13. Her dog she had in the basement and it did it's business down there. When I ask her to clean it she said she did well 3 weeks later I went down stairs to find a plastic bag full of you know what under the steps. All she did was read books. If she made something to eat my DH and I couldn't eat it. Never did she buy any food. Now she wants to know if he can come. I dont want her or him here but she is family and I want to see the kids. If it were up to me she would not have the kids. They are learning nothing. They have no home because they live with his mom and dad. They moved from one town and left all their belongings there. I have a lot of hard feeling against my sister as you can see. She makes my skin craw and I know I will be up tight all day if she brings him. Can anyone give me some ideas on what to say to her in a nice way, that I dont want him to come. Or should I just say it out right that I don't want him to come? Maybe I'll cancel the party this way I don't have to worry about it. Sorry I guess it wasn't a short story.