Why did the chicken cross the road? Depends upon who you ask...

Discussion in 'Games, Jokes, and Fun!' started by JennsPeeps, Oct 28, 2008.

  1. JennsPeeps

    JennsPeeps Rhymes with 'henn'

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    BARACK OBAMA: The chicken crossed the road because it was time for a change! The chicken wanted change!

    JOHN MC CAIN: My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road.

    SARAH PALIN: Because, Praise Jesus, I was gonna shoot his sorry liberal rear end off for blocking my view of Russia!

    HILLARY CLINTON: When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little chicken to cross the road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure right from Day One that every chicken in this country gets the chance it deserves to cross the road. But then, this really isn't about me.

    GEORGE W. BUSH: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not. The chicken is either for us or against us. There is no middle ground here.

    DICK CHENEY: Where's my gun?

    COLIN POWELL: Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road.

    CARL ROVE: It was a Democrat chicken flip-flopping. It's always the Democrats. Republican chickens never cross the road.

    BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with that chicken. What is your definition of crossing?

    AL GORE: It was looking for a lock box for its eggs.

    JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it.

    AL SHARPTON: Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens.

    DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that
    he must first deal with the problem on this side of the road before it goes after the problem on the other side of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his current problems before adding new problems.

    OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.

    ANDERSON COOPER, CNN: We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road.

    NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because he's guilty! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.

    PAT BUCHANAN: To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.

    MARTHA STEWART: No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmers Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.

    DR SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.

    ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain, alone.

    JERRY FALWELL: Because the chicken was gay! Can't you people see the plain
    truth? That's why they call it the other side. Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And if you eat that chicken, you will become gay, too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like the other side. That chicken should not be crossing the road. It's as plain and as simple as that.

    GRANDPA: In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.

    BARBARA WALTERS: Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heartwarming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its lifelong dream of crossing the road.

    ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

    JOHN LENNON: Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in peace.

    BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken2008, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook. Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken2008. This new platform is much more stable and will never crash.

    ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?

    COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one?
     
  2. 77horses

    77horses ◊The Spontaneous Pullet!◊

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    [CONFIDENTIAL]
    [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] Funny!!! [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG]
     
  3. joerogrz

    joerogrz Chillin' With My Peeps

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    I thought Al Gore invented the chicken?!?[​IMG][​IMG]
     
  4. Year of the Rooster

    Year of the Rooster Sebright Savvy

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    No matter how many times I see this, it always gives me a good laugh [​IMG]
     
  5. Pumpkinpup

    Pumpkinpup Poultry Princess

    Jul 16, 2008
    North-West Georgia
    This was just too darn funny!!!! Thanks for the laugh! [​IMG] [​IMG]
     
  6. 7490jonathan

    7490jonathan New Egg

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    Me: The chicken crossed the road because there was a bar of chocolate lying around on the other side that it really wanted! At least, that’s why I would have crossed the road! [​IMG]
    I love the quotes though, even if I don’t know who everyone of those people are exactly, especially the ones about Einstein and Clinton are really funny. Where did you get this anyway, or did you make it up? [​IMG]
     
  7. The Chicken Lady

    The Chicken Lady Moderator Staff Member

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    West Michigan
    Quote:A chicken is a series of tubes... [​IMG]

    [​IMG]
     
  8. JennsPeeps

    JennsPeeps Rhymes with 'henn'

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    Quote:It's an internet joke been going around awhile.

    Now that I have chickens, I'm connvinced that the only reason a chicken would cross the road is for food.
     

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