Anyone not able to have Children?

To sillychicken yes I was in a ton of pain but I was one who my only dream was to have a child. It was in my every cell. My very reason to live. That's how bad I wanted a child. When I heard that will never be, I died inside. I still feel dead inside. I have tried to fill the void with animals but no matter how many I have, its still there. With me it was the h word or cancer. Otherwise I would still be in the horrific pain I was in still trying to have a baby.
To henjoy I have looked into foster care (have realitives that do it) and it still scares me. I'm very emotional so having a child in ,y home for just one day and having it taken from me would kill me.

To everyone I just want to say I never thought this thread would get the response it did. I am pleasently surprised. It has allowed people to discuss this issue and I think it needs to be talked about more openly.

I have been considering a suragate mother but don't know where to start. Does s anyone have thoughts on this topic

My daughter and her husband have been trying for 10 years. In 2006 she miscarried her first pregnancy. In 2010 they went to a fertility specialist. There were fertility problems with both daughter and her husband. They tried the first level (I forget what it's called) three times with no luck. Then they tried the actual in vitro. The first one didn't take. The second time she got pregnant with twins and almost immediately lost them.

In 2011 they started the foster care process. They got their first two beautiful children, Lillie and Josh, in September 2012. They were precious! Well, the state decided to take them back and give them to an aunt the week before Christmas! This pretty much ripped daughter and her hubby's hearts out, of course, but they tried again. In early 2013, little Lizzie (4 months old) came into their lives. After about 4 to 5 months, the state decided to give her back to her druggie mother, again ripping my daughter and her husband apart.

As you said, adoption isn't an option. The cost is just way to high.

They are going to try again in 2014, one last time. I'm scared to death for them!

Meanwhile, I just sent off Christmas presents to Daughter, her Hubby, and my 4 Grand-kitties!

Hysterectomy is definitely not the end of having children!!! Surrogacy would be unaffordable due to high cost, hence a lot of US couples are using Indian Surrogate mothers to have their babies!! Lets face it 1$ is roughly 50 INR. So with little money a surrogate mother can be hired in a developing country like India. The key here is finding a good and respectable Gynecologist!! Keep your sunny side up peeps!! It's definitely not the end of the world!

My wife and I were married 38 years ago. We waiting for about 4 years after getting married to begin the process of getting pregnant. We both wanted children, in fact I had told my wife before we were married that I wanted at least a dozen children. After spending about a year of trying to become pregnant, we both visited a doctor to find out what was wrong. My wife's tubes were damaged and she had surgery to repair them. When they didn't work we tried invitro fertilization. Invitro was new at this time and not available many places. After trying invitro several times without success's we had to accept the fact that we would be childless.
There was much pain for us, more so for my wife. You have to endure many cruel comments from people that may not realize their comments are hurtful. After 10 years of marriage my sister worked with a young man that had gotten his girlfriend pregnant and they had decided to give the baby up for adoption. We called them and arranged a private adoption. We live in Alabama and they lived in Illinois, there were many legal hurtles to overcome, but it happened.You can imagine our joy. We had a beautiful baby boy!!.
When our son was 7 years old and I was his baseball coach, we had a young boy on our baseball team that was in foster care. One of the foster parents had cancer and was dieing. DHR had to remove the boy from the home and they called us to find out what the baseball schedule was. They were looking for a home to place the boy in and we offered ours. After some paper work was in place they brought him and his younger sister to us. A couple of months later we found out there was another sister with downs. She was later placed with us also. We were able to adopt them as a family unit after about a year.
After you become foster parents you can expect to get many request for placements due to the great demand for foster parents. We were asked to take in a 8 month old girl, which we did. After we had her for 4 months her birth mother had another child, a boy. If you have a child taken from you, any additional children you have are taken also. So we ended up with a 2 day old boy also.
After having both of them for almost 4 years and living with the fear that they could be returned to their birth parents at anytime we were finally able to adopt them also.
I tell you all of this Crazyfarmer to let you know that even though things seems really gloom that there is always hope. We did not know what God had in store for us. We had much depression and even anger at times when we thought we would be left out of life's greatest joys. But after much praying and with the support of our friends, family and church family we finally had our family. I have always felt that God needed me to mature to the point that he thought I would make a decent father.
We still wonder sometimes what a biological child of our own would be like, but I am confident that our parenting adventures have been directed and chosen by God. We still have two children at home, and have two wonderful grandchildren with another on the way.
Be patient and follow God's will for you, we will be praying for you in your journey.

What a wonderfully heartwarming and encouraging story waynec1955. It seems to me that there was always a plan for you and your wonderful wife!

Waynec thank you for that story. Even if I would want to become a foster parent I don't think I could qualify. I have had things done in the past that they would definity not let me. (It wasn't anything illegal) . I wish I could make everyone see that its just not that easy. I wish it could be. I would love to just say hey sign me up for foster care. But the minute they see I've been put in a mental hospitol twice.... they gonna be like yeah right. I'm not crazy but I suffer from severe depression. 2 strikes against me

Just to add to what others have said, depending on the state and your licensing worker, you could possibly still qualify for fostering depending on how long ago you had issues and if you have them under control now. You may need a written mental health evaluation stating you are in good mental health to go along with the physical exam. It might be worth looking into if you have interest.