I love my neighbors but...

[tacmomma12]

There's a line between being neighborly and being a doormat. Your neighbors sound like maybe they are a bit lonely, and maybe also they either don't want to/can't afford to pay for a handyman to come and assist them instead. Unfortunately there's not always an easy way to find out which applies without offending someone. Does the couple offer to do things for you in return? Not big things, but something to show they appreciate it?

Perhaps your husband could speak to them and say look, I'm happy to help you, let's pick one night a week where I spent an hour or two to lend you a hand. How about Tuesdays? The rest of the week, I need to spend evenings with my family and give my lovely wife a break. If the neighbor persists on asking on other days, he could either remind him of the agreement by saying "I'll gladly look at that on Tuesday." or something along those lines?

 

[7 Biddies]

Unfortunately, people will take advantage of those who allow themselves to be taken advantage of. It's the nature of the beast. It appears your neighbors don't know how to respect boundaries or set limits, so you're going to have to "help" them. What's the worst that can happen; you get your lives back? Your children get their father back? Just because your neighbors are putting their needs first, doesn't mean you have to put their needs first, too.

Giving in and always being "nice" isn't going to get your needs met. I can hear that your resentment of them is already building; you need to do something about it before it causes big problems between you and your husband, and/or the neighbors. Folks have made lots of good suggestions about how to honestly express your feelings and your needs. I hope you'll find a way to put things right.