When I was a kid......

[BBQJOE]

When I was a kid, my Mom used to bake cakes and let me lick the beater.
Imagine how upset I was when I learned my friend's Mom's did the same thing, but their Mom's turned the beater off first.

 

[BBQJOE]

But anyways, my Mom was always a barrel of laughs. If she wasn't that, then she was scaring the bejesus out of us.
I'll never forget my 8th birthday. She invited a bunch of my friends over and we played lots of games. We played the game where you try to drop clothes pins in the milk bottle, then we played pin the tail on my little brother. Boy could he scream, but we all laughed and laughed.
No one in the whole group had the guts to try when she wanted us to play bob for apples in the deep fryer.

But the thing I'll never forget was the pinata. She found one that looked just like my pet Beagle, Scramble.
Everybody took a whack or two at that pinata while wearing that dumb blind fold, but nobody could bust it. Turn after turn, it just hung there swinging. I finally got mad, and grabbed the bat from the kid wearing the blindfold.
I started thrashing the daylights out of that paper mache dog, while all the while my Mom was screaming at me yelling that that isn't how the game's played. She screamed if I didn't stop, it would be my very last birthday party!

I gave her an evil sneer and a wicked eye. I ran to the back of the garage, then came charging at that stupid pinata. I gave a scream at the top of my lungs, lunged into the air, wound up, and the bat came violently down, pummeling that dumb smiling beagle. It almost broke in half.

The horror of what came next startled everyone, my Mom laughed hysterically as well as maniacally. My little brother cried, little Jimmy wet his pants, and my buddy Rolf, who could handle anything, barfed chocolate cake and Neapolitan ice cream halfway across the room. I just stood there, aghast, wanting to cover my eyes as I saw what came out of the pinata.
My stomach got a little woozy, and my legs went weak, but I just stood there staring, while my Mom continued to laugh like a drunken idiot, much like many parents did at a kids birthday parties.

I began to wonder why. Why would she do this? What had I done to deserve such a horrendous ending to my birthday party, and who was going to clean up all the pee and puke?

My therapist still says this may one day go away. But it's now been 47 years, and I fear the memory is forever burned in my brain, and that it will haunt my dreams forever.






For you see, she filled the pinata with watered down ketchup.







Edit:
Come to think of it, I never did have another birthday party.

 

[BBQJOE]

When I was a kid, this was one of my biggest fears.





But it always seemed more like this...

 

[drumstick diva]

Ah the good old days - takes me back. Nowadays when I bake, I make sure to hold back a lot in the mixing bowl, because the batter is always the best part.

 

[Pork Pie]

When I was a kid, my Mom used to bake cakes and let me lick the beater.
Imagine how upset I was when I learned my friend's Mom's did the same thing, but their Mom's turned the beater off first.

Thats explains a lot

 

[Athaid]

Wait, you're not supposed to leave it on?

 

[drumstick diva]

If you leave the mixer turned on it will shoot batter all over the kitchen - even though that is lots of fun, you don't end up with much to eat.

 

[drumstick diva]

Why does the "submit" button keep doubling my posts, once it even put up 4 of the same and I had to edit 3 of them

 

[Athaid]

Not as fun as using the blender with the lid off

(I'm having issues with the submit button too)

 

[BBQJOE]

If you leave the mixer turned on it will shoot batter all over the kitchen - even though that is lots of fun, you don't end up with much to eat.

Not as fun as using the blender with the lid off

(I'm having issues with the submit button too)

Another fun one was when she made popcorn. All of us kids would stand around the stove, and once the corn started popping, she'd remove the lid!