Clean Blonde Jokes!!!

[jbirds2012]

this blond was givin some odd jobs to do for a neigbor to make some extra money. so he handed her some paint and asked to paint the porch she came back in, an hour latter and ask for more paint because there wasn't enough to finish painting the car

 

[kyla]

No because we are referring to suicidal blondes, you know dyed by their own hand....

I got in trouble for posting a dirty blonde joke....

 

[wildriverswolf90]

What do you do if a blonde throw a grenade at you?
Pull the pin and throw it back.

 

[kyla]

What do u get if u put a blonde in a freezer?
Frosted Flakes!!!

 

[BinaryChicken]

January - Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight.

February - Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels....."duh".....bottles won't fit in typewriter!!!

March - Got excited.....finished jigsaw puzzle in 6 months.....box said "2-4 years!"

April - Trapped on escalator for hours.....power went out!!!

May - Tried to make Kool-Aid.....8 cups of water won't fit into those little packets!!!

June - Tried to go water skiing.....couldn't find a lake with a slope.

July - Lost breast stroke swimming competition.....learned later, other swimmers cheated, they used their arms!!!

August - Got locked out of car in rain storm.....car swamped, because top was down.

September - The capital of California is "C".....isn't it???

October - Hate M & M's.....they are so hard to peel.

November - Baked turkey for 4 1/2 days.....instructions said 1 hour per pound and I weigh 108!!!

December - Couldn't call 911....."duh".....there's no "eleven" button on the phone!!!

 

[BinaryChicken]

(this isnt technicaly a blonde joke but it works).

A blonde , a brunet and a redhead are in a prison camp.

they are about to be executed.

the redhead goes up in front of the firing squad.

and just as the soldiers are about to shoot she yells " avalanche"

They all take cover and she gets away.

the brunet goes up in front of the firing squad.

and when they are about to shoot she yells "flood"

they all duck for cover and she gets away.

the blonde goes up in front of the firing squad.

as they are about to shoot she yells "fire"

 

[jbirds2012]

What do you do if a blonde throw a grenade at you?
Pull the pin and throw it back.

that was an old polish joke. it originated because the germans went in and kicked there (caught them by surprise) i have known a few polish folks and on average they are as about as down home, good hearted folks as anyone else. i am 1/2 croation, 1/4 german, 1/8th cherokee indian and 1/8th english. and thou i don't condone what my ancseters did, i retain no white guilt.

 

[kyla]

I'm sooo glad tht i started this thread!!!

 

[BinaryChicken]

that was an old polish joke. it originated because the germans went in and kicked there (caught them by surprise) i have known a few polish folks and on average they are as about as down home, good hearted folks as anyone else. i am 1/2 croation, 1/4 german, 1/8th cherokee indian and 1/8th english. and thou i don't condone what my ancseters did, i retain no white guilt.

yeah i know it as a joke teaching the irish

 

[kyla]

Anybody else glad tht i founded this thread?