Lack of respect in young people today

[thaiturkey]

Quote:
You sound quite angry. No need. It's OK if someone has a point of view different from yours. To respond to your post:

1. Your choice of terms to describe minors suggests that you have less respect for them than you would wish them to have for you.

2. I didn't ask you to care and you don't need to attempt to make personal remarks about me because you know nothing about me. If you wish to turn my attempt to explain my view into a childish exchange such as that, you're on your own.

3. Smacking a child's face can easily teach him or her the wrong way to behave as an adult. Be careful, especially if you intend to smack someone else's kid.

4. You are an expert in what is the biggest problem with 'the youth of today' and you think it's people with 'my mindset'? There you go generalising. There you go again trying to attack me because you don't agree with me. You credit me with words that I have not written. You also make more disparaging remarks about children. How about an adult discussion of different views? You can try it with adolescents too. There are more subtle and effective way to influence and control children if you take the trouble to learn.

I'm interested to learn more about your own philosophy. So far, and please correct me if I'm wrong, you are saying that you keep control by using fear and beating your children. Is that right? Please expand on that because it is a method of parenting that was once quite common and it would be interesting to get a modern day explanation of how it benefits the children concerned. Getting back to the OP's original complaint, how would you apply your methods personally to the children of other people who annoyed you?

 

[thaiturkey]

Quote:
Is that why she went out or was she annoyed at being disturbed? Are you suggesting that kids are accused before they do any wrong? That's a great way to encourage them to go ahead; 'If I'm going to be accused I might as well just do it'.

I'm guessing that you didn't see the part of being called a dirty whore just for trying to find out what the noise was about? Just the attitude smacks of guilt, maybe it's acceptable in Thailand to call women b!tches and whores, here in America it's a real good sign of a kid that's ALREADY been in trouble and looking for more.

Did she ACCUSE them of anything? I didn't see where she did, so you're reasoning is a little off base there.

No, it's not OK in either Thailand or the UK. I haven't said it is and I wouldn't find it acceptable. Why did you make that remark?

The OP approached kids who were on public property and evidently not breaking any law. She has every right to be unhappy about the disturbance and I would not be surprised if she felt a little concerned. However, she seems not to have really suspected them of any criminal act or potential for violence because she drove out to confront them alone in the early hours. I suspect that she was just angry and wanted to say so. In response to her approach, whatever that really was, they swore at her. What she claims they said isn't acceptable but the kids might say that her intrusion wasn't either. Now, I wonder what the kids' version of the story would be if they were here to defend themselves. Every story has two sides.

Parenting is the most important jobs in the world and one of the most difficult. Getting it wrong can affect the whole of someone's life. We all have our different views and experiences. I'm happy to discuss this, way beyond the OP's original post, but can we behave like the adults we would like our children to be? Why resort to personal or snide remarks when someone disagrees with us?

 

[Blackbird]

Quote:

I've always admired you Ceta, you are one tough lady!! Whoo!


After living in an abusive household over 18 years, I can tell you I wish I would have been punished for ACTUALLY DOING something wrong, not for the heck of it.

Thai, I highly doubt Cetawin is condoning child abuse or anything remarkably similar. When a kid pushes boundaries, parents need to push back.
I do think kids need to learn to fear the punishment, and that their actions and mistakes have consequences - but I definitely see both sides of it. I'm ALL for trying to explain actions and consequences and the why's and how's to a kid, but the kid must also know that I hold their safety and well-being at the utmost high, so they better listen to me first, ask questions later. Then again, I'm not a parent.

 

[thaiturkey]

Quote:
I didn't mention child abuse but now that you do I see what you mean. There are various ways of 'pushing back' and I'm happy to join a rational discussion about them. I have read some quite shocking disrespectful descriptions of children today and that's very disappointing in a thread about child behaviour. Not a very good example to them, I suggest.

 

[The Chicken Lady]

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